Leaving Christianity

Site last updated 16th March 2008
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Preface

Over the years I have come to know and know of many ex-Christians most of whom were well-churched, their numbers including former ministers, apologists, missionaries, theologians etc. Why should such people leave Christianity? These people are the best versed in Christianity and yet they leave despite so much personal and professional investment in their religion, enjoyment of their time as believing Christians and social pressures to stay. How can this happen if the evidence for Christianity is so good? If supernatural Christianity is true, shouldn't they have known better?

But what if the history and philosophical and moral implications of the various branches of Christianity are very different from that which is traditionally taught? The painful fact for many Christians is that through research and thinking this is the conclusion to which they often come. Why else should all these people leave, contrary to their world-view, culture, professions, and heavy investment in Christianity? Why would God go to the trouble of incarnation and crucifixion only to allow genuine seekers to find Christianity untenable, or give "spurious" experiences and "incorrect" interpretation to those who spend so many years trying to be Christians? From our research and testimonies it is apparent that Christianity is not what we once thought it was.

I hope that these collected stories and resources will be of comfort to new deconverts. There is no "exit counselling" from the church and usually our Christian friends just want to find out "where we went wrong" rather than really listen and explore with us. It can be a great thrill to find fellow travellers in what is usually a very lonely journey with often few or no sympathetic people to turn to. I thought I was the first to deconvert from a genuine heartfelt Christianity until I discovered a few hints in books, some friends with similar stories and then the voluminous accounts on the Internet!

I hope to keep these pages fresh as I am still in the process of collecting stories and links and discussing this subject with various interested parties. Discussing religion can of course be very contentious and although primarily a resource for ex-Christians it is inevitable that some believing Christians, or others with different opinions, will surf here and wish to criticise this site. I have tried to avoid too much scornful material, although sometimes emotions rise in some of the reported on-line discussions - I am not from Vulcan! But if you think I have not been fair or really have missed something then I'd like to know. All criticism is welcome as long as it is not a knee-jerk at just reading a little of what I have to offer as such criticism is less interesting and causes too much repetition.

This site started partly as a FAQ when on debating lists and also as a collection of my bookmarks, so there is some of my own material here. However I don't think I have got the most to say, although I have included my own story with as much detail as I think is necessary for those who are interested. I am occasionally worried that I will one day be put in a corner by religious friends or relatives, so this is also my considered FAQ for any of them, rather than an emotional confrontation. Luckily it has not yet been needed - I have coped with carefully placed comments, so far! The bulk of the material is contained in the links to the writings of other people which is exactly the sort of information I wish I had found back in the mid 1980's when I was asking all those questions....

Contents

  1. My Journey and thoughts

  2. Why I left Christianity Includes notes for deeper investigation into what I read and thought.
    Influential books - many with links to free on-line versions.
    Asymmetry of Conversion My investigation into the asymmetry between the large number of well-churched Christians who leave Christianity versus the scarcity of those educated in the problems of Christianity who later become Christians. This also contains my essay on the resurrection and many further resources.
    Selections of postings I have made to various newsgroups and mailing lists.
    Crazy stuff from the bible.
    Conundrums.

    Feedback discussions I attempt to discuss with those who raise interesting points with me. If you are planning to evangelize, please check that I have not already had the conversation about your points here, or elsewhere in part 1 of this site.

    For a summary of my discoveries whilst researching and compiling this website, see my guest essay. (Off site). To compliment this summary, I have compiled a quotes page of great snippets lifted from some of the deconversion stories contained within, or linked from, this site.

  3. The journeys and thoughts of others

  4. Main Links Includes resources for study and links to hundreds of informative deconversion stories and all the discussion groups for ex-Christians that I am aware of, both on the Internet and in real life!
    Reciprocal Links Includes both those in accord with my site and those in disagreement.

  5. Study Resources

  6. Some of the best places I have found for serious study. This includes:

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And relatedly...

Other recommended sites in accord with my site. These include valuable resources on the theme of leaving Christianity but also related matters.
  • Atheism Central for Secondary Schools "Help with homework assignments and general support for atheist students attending religious studies courses in secondary schools in the United Kingdom (age range 11-18)." Alan Urdaibay's site addresses the imbalance in RE teaching in UK schools. I have a guest essay at Alan's site, in which I summarise my findings to date in compiling Leaving Christianity. Alan also describes how he became disillusioned with religion.
Atheism Central
  • Freethought crossroads "If you're at a crossroads between faith and reason, feeling the pull of each, this site is for you."
freethought Crossroads
(Note this site appears to be no longer active and this version is therefore taken from the Internet Archive)
  • Religious Humanism and Belief Systems "The main purpose of this website is to provide some reasonable justification and some confidence for you who are in the process of walking away from your traditional belief system. -- to possibly give you a little head start by using some of the "spade work" that I have done. -- this may save you some effort and time."
  • Reasonworks.com "Audio Tapes and Articles for Agnostics, Atheists, Skeptics ... and Even Curious Religious Folk!" By former Mormon Mike Earl et al.
come.to/thinker
  • The Skeptic's Annotated Bible. "This easily navigable site contains the entire text of the King James Version of the bible presented from a skeptic's point of view. It identifies the bible's absurdities, cruelties, sex and vulgarities, insults to women, injustices, foul language, false prophecies, and contradictions. Verses are classified using a four star rating system, with cross-referenced links and attached notes."
  • An intelligent and absorbing analysis: The Rejection of Pascal's Wager - A skeptic's guide to Christianity.
    "The Central Thesis: The major claims of Christianity are demonstrably untrue and, on balance, it has brought more harm than good to the world."
  • Edward T. Babinski. A true romp of entertaining and intellectual deep thought. Good fun whilst also a wide range of perceptive and well-researched thinking on creation vs. evolution, leaving the fold, Christian history, biblical errancy etc. Incisive commentary on an extraordinary variety of other Christian beliefs and phenomena. Gentle yet serious deprogramming for the confused. Many people have written to Ed thanking him for helping then in their walk away from fundamentalism.
    Ed also runs the resource www.fundamentalists-anonymous.org
    At From Young Earth Creationist to Evolutionist Edward T. Babinski describes how he was a YEC-evangelical Christian who turned evolutionist and agnostic. Read his account of the events and knowledge which changed his beliefs forever.
    Also see ED B's story from the ex-Christian mailing list archives.
    Ed also has a page on the secular web here.
Click here for details of the book 'Leaving the Fold' by Ed Babinski


Reciprocal Links with Christian sites.


Interactive Area

Don't be shy... send me email Feel free to email me with any other collections of deconversion stories you know of, feedback or links to other sites I've missed that you think are particularly relevant. Also I would be glad to arrange reciprocal links to your site if it is relevant and especially if it disagrees with mine. I will also put up your own deconversion story if you wish, although now it is probably better to send it straight to the exchristian.org database to enable other readers to easily search for ex-Christians with similar backgrounds to themselves.

If you want to leave a message for everyone to see, then please sign my guestbook. Note that if you are writing to convince me that Christianity is true, please check that I have not already discussed your ideas to your satisfaction on my pages or in my feedback discussions.
Guestbook started 11th July 1999

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If you used to be active in an atheist organisation and considered yourself well-read in arguments against Christianity and yet subsequently became a Christian, I would be very interested if you could email me to explain, or put resources that convinced you in the guestbook if you would prefer to stay anonymous. See Asymmetry of Conversion for the background to this question.

If you are an ex-minister then you may wish to at the Freedom From Religion Foundation Inc. Dan is currently engaged in writing a book about former clergy who are now unbelievers. He is also an ex-minister and ex-missionary who has written a popular book about his deconversion (excerpts are available). I wrote to him in December 1999 to enquire about the progress of this and to maybe give him some more leads. He replied that he has over 20 stories so far, and is hoping to get a few more. The ones he has represent a wide cross section of belief: Baptist, Roman Catholic priest, Seventh Day Adventist, Pentecostal, Episcopal, Church of Christ, and so on. Dan may well be interested in your story of why you are an ex-Christian and ex-member of the clergy.


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