Leaving Christianity
What's new
Preface
Over the years I have come to know and know of many ex-Christians most of whom were well-churched, their numbers including former ministers, apologists, missionaries, theologians etc. Why should such people leave Christianity? These people are the best versed in Christianity and yet they leave despite so much personal and professional investment in their religion, enjoyment of their time as believing Christians and social pressures to stay. How can this happen if the evidence for Christianity is so good? If supernatural Christianity is true, shouldn't they have known better?
But what if the history and philosophical and moral implications of the various branches of Christianity are very different from that which is traditionally taught? The painful fact for many Christians is that through research and thinking this is the conclusion to which they often come. Why else should all these people leave, contrary to their world-view, culture, professions, and heavy investment in Christianity? Why would God go to the trouble of incarnation and crucifixion only to allow genuine seekers to find Christianity untenable, or give "spurious" experiences and "incorrect" interpretation to those who spend so many years trying to be Christians? From our research and testimonies it is apparent that Christianity is not what we once thought it was.
I hope that these collected stories and resources will be of comfort to new deconverts. There is no "exit counselling" from the church and usually our Christian friends just want to find out "where we went wrong" rather than really listen and explore with us. It can be a great thrill to find fellow travellers in what is usually a very lonely journey with often few or no sympathetic people to turn to. I thought I was the first to deconvert from a genuine heartfelt Christianity until I discovered a few hints in books, some friends with similar stories and then the voluminous accounts on the Internet!
I hope to keep these pages fresh as I am still in the process of collecting stories and links and discussing this subject with various interested parties. Discussing religion can of course be very contentious and although primarily a resource for ex-Christians it is inevitable that some believing Christians, or others with different opinions, will surf here and wish to criticise this site. I have tried to avoid too much scornful material, although sometimes emotions rise in some of the reported on-line discussions - I am not from Vulcan! But if you think I have not been fair or really have missed something then I'd like to know. All criticism is welcome as long as it is not a knee-jerk at just reading a little of what I have to offer as such criticism is less interesting and causes too much repetition.
This site started partly as a FAQ when on debating lists and also as a collection of my bookmarks, so there is some of my own material here. However I don't think I have got the most to say, although I have included my own story with as much detail as I think is necessary for those who are interested. I am occasionally worried that I will one day be put in a corner by religious friends or relatives, so this is also my considered FAQ for any of them, rather than an emotional confrontation. Luckily it has not yet been needed - I have coped with carefully placed comments, so far! The bulk of the material is contained in the links to the writings of other people which is exactly the sort of information I wish I had found back in the mid 1980's when I was asking all those questions....
Contents
- My Journey and thoughts
- The journeys and thoughts of others
- Study Resources
Why I left Christianity Includes notes for deeper investigation into what I read and thought.
Influential books - many with links to free on-line versions.
Asymmetry of Conversion My investigation into the asymmetry between the large number of well-churched Christians who leave Christianity versus the scarcity of those educated in the problems of Christianity who later become Christians. This also contains my essay on the resurrection and many further resources.
Selections of postings I have made to various newsgroups and mailing lists.
Crazy stuff from the bible.
Conundrums.
Feedback discussions I attempt to discuss with those who raise interesting points with me. If you are planning to evangelize, please check that I have not already had the conversation about your points here, or elsewhere in part 1 of this site.
For a summary of my discoveries whilst researching and compiling this website, see my guest essay. (Off site). To compliment this summary, I have compiled a quotes page of great snippets lifted from some of the deconversion stories contained within, or linked from, this site.
Main Links Includes resources for study and links to hundreds of informative deconversion stories and all the discussion groups for ex-Christians that I am aware of, both on the Internet and in real life!
Reciprocal Links Includes both those in accord with my site and those in disagreement.
Some of the best places I have found for serious study. This includes:
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Main Links (Also see notes).
- Ontario Consultants on religious tolerance. Good general research tool. Also required reading for any visitors to pro/con religious sites!
- Testimonials page on the Secular Web. Some very heartfelt and well written accounts.
- Ex-Christian stories
- Collected deconversion stories This is a zip file (189kb) of deconversion stories in TXT, RTF and HTML formats mainly from the ex-Christian mailing list archives. Unless specific permission has been given to publish these stories I have removed references to full names.
- List of Ex-Christian webring sites. Most of these sites contain deconversion stories.
- Recovering from Religion Webring.
- Fundamentalism and Deconversion webring
- List of Leaving Born Again Fundamentalist Christianity Webring sites
- Deconversion stories emailed to me or found from personal websites not on the ex-Christian webring.
- The Ex-tian homepage Mailing list and resource for ex-Christians.
- The ex-Christian mailing list archives.
- The Secular Web's ex-Christians page. I now maintain this page myself. When I adopted this page I was asked to try to give preference to papers that are archived on the Secular Web but also to link to the good stuff that's out there. So it's mostly a high quality subset of my site. Well worth investigation for good quality material.
- Walk Away from Fundamentalism Support, advice, and community for those who have left or are in the process of leaving fundamentalist Christianity.
- Ex-Christian.net
- Former conservative Christian women including details of their books and other writings.
- Recovery from the International Churches of Christ (ICC)
- ex-pentecostals.org
- Fundamentalists Anonymous. The purpose for Fundamentalists Anonymous is to put people in touch with available resources, and testimonies, of individuals who have abandoned fundamentalism, cults, and religious fanaticism. This project (started October 19, 2003) is designed to index every known testimony of De-Conversion from all religions, that exists on the web - including in-depth details (as much as the person feels comfortable with). The site is operated by Ed Babinski the author of Leaving the Fold, which documented the testimonies of over 30 individuals who abandoned fundamentalism and religious fanaticism.
- The Courage to Walk Away: How to Escape From Cults. Includes a big download of deconversion stories (including from "main stream" Christianity) and other resources.
- exchristian.org This is a database (started end Nov. 1999) where people may post their stories about losing their faith in biblical Christianity. It uses a form to enter descriptive keywords and either the text of the story or a URL. Hence readers can then search for ex-Christians with similar backgrounds to themselves.
- Losing my Religion.com "A support site for those leaving the Christian faith"
- USENET Testimonies. This page contains testimonials from ex-Christians extracted from Usenet.
- Secular Testimonies. Deconversion stories from SecularLife.org
- De-conversion stories collection on the Positive Atheism website.
- Testimonies from exchristian.net
- Letters from Leavers
- Out of Christianity We were once not only Christians, but youth pastors, evangelists, nuns, and music ministers, yet we've left the Christian faith.
- Deconversion stories from The Infidel Guy radio show. Note these are mp3 files.
- From Minister to Atheist Joe Holeman (also see below).
- Robin Savage a former preacher's wife.
- Deconversion stories listed at Ebon Musings.
- The Joy of
Disillusionment by David Crews.
David wrote to me: 'The Joy of Disillusionment is directed at the same audience - those going through that especially difficult and lonely transition out of organized Christianity. I offer a philosophical, positive and hopefully helpful analysis of the new worldview of the recently de-religioned person, as well as some poetry and even a "revised" parable.'
I was very impressed with the way David identified and discussed some of the most poignant issues that confront a new ex-Christian, or those in the process of this awakening. I found his writings not only warm, humane and even "spiritual" but also purveying the real heat of the thoughts and emotions that so many of us have gone through. I am sure many visitors to my site will find David's quality writing to be very helpful. - Losing my Religion.com "A support site for those leaving the Christian faith"
- Books by (and about) ex-Christians
- Excerpts From Losing Faith In Faith: From Preacher To Atheist by Dan Barker
- Why I Left The Ministry And Became An Atheist By the ex-Methodist minister G. Vincent Runyon
- The Reverend Don Cupitt explains how the scales fell from his eyes This is a section from the link below:-
- The Sea of Faith Network The SoF Network explores the implications of accepting religion as a human creation. Many senior current and past churchmen (and women) are part of this organisation. Examples of transitions from traditional Christian to Sea of Faith non-realist are available in the accounts from Anne Horner, Jude Bullock and others at Personal essays. Also see my comments on Cupitt.
- The Very Reverend Andrew William Ussher Furlong. Dean of Clonmacnoise in Ireland who (as of December 2001) has been suspended by his bishop for his progressive views. Andrew Furlong's Articles are available, both at his main link above and at The Center for Progressive Christianity. Furlong's transformation is outlined at Treasure In Earthen Vessels: Reflections of a Reformer. The Dean's publications can also be found in the theology section of Anglicans Online and at Furlong's articles in the TCPC library]. Frank Walker reviews Andrew Furlong's story in Tried for Heresy: a 21st-century journey of faith, published by O Books, 2003, 1903816521. Andrew muses on the accusation of heresy made against him by the Church of Ireland in 2002 in a recent Guardian Face to Faith column titled Pilgrim's Progress.
- John Dominic Crossan. A leading scholarly member of The Jesus Seminar and a former Monk and Priest, Crossan explains why his scholarship led him to see religion as a purely human creation.
- Marcus Borg another prominent scholar of the Jesus Seminar, describes his journey.
- Gerd Lüdemann The German Lutheran theologian's reasons for leaving Christianity and the fall-out that this brought to his career. Also see Gerd Lüdemann at the Secular Web.
- Geza Vermes - Fellow of the British Academy and Prof. Emeritus of Jewish Studies in the University of Oxford. Vermes was a Priest in the Sion Order but left the Priesthood and the Catholic church after his groundbreaking work on the Dead Sea scrolls, no longer considering himself a Christian.
- Professor Michael Goulder Notes from an interview with this ex-Priest and renowned biblical scholar.
- Bart Ehrman
is the James A. Gray Distinguished Professor and Chair of the
Department of Religious Studies at the University of North Carolina at
Chapel Hill. Once he was a fundamentalist Christian, seminarian and
graduate of the Moody Bible Institute, but became an agnostic during
his studies. There are some interesting articles and interviews with
Bart Ehrman at the following sites:
- Bart Ehrman: "Misquoting Jesus" (scroll down to the end of the page for the audio interview). This includes Bart's account of his changing beliefs.
- Bart Ehrman's 'Misquoting Jesus' (includes audio interview)
- Bart Ehrman's 'Lost Christianities' (audio interview)
- Resurrection debate with William Lane Craig
- Bart Ehrman With Jon Stewart (video interview)
- From Fundamentalist to Humanist by Robert M. Price. Also see his Beyond Born Again. Robert Price has appeared as "the Bible Geek" on The Infidel Guy radio show. The free podcasts are here and you can also find more by searching for "Robert Price" and "bible geek" at YouTube.
- Why I am agnostic The famous freethinker Robert Ingersoll describes the research and thinking that led him to agnosticism and the joy that this new world view gave him. Ingersoll's other writings are also available.
- Why I Quit Going To Church by Robert Hughes (With Answers to Critics and Correspondents).
- Joseph McCabe: Fighter For Freethought Short Biography of the famous ex-monk by Issac Goldberg.
- Farrell Till's deconversion story
- From Minister to Honest Doubter: Why I Changed my Mind - a book by John W. Loftus, a former Christian apologist and student of Dr. William Lane Craig. John has invited people to comment on his book here. John also runs a Blog Debunking Christianity.
- Raymond Fontaine - former Priest, now Deist.
- Ray Billington - a former Priest, now atheist.
- From Missionary Bible Translator to Agnostic. Kenneth Daniels gently yet powerfully describes his journey, including insights into the depths of his prayer life as he struggled with doubts and the respectful way he dealt with his critics. Captivating, sincere, detailed, and dramatic! Further articles documenting his views and journey are available here.
- www.ministerturnsatheist.org. Joe Holman, a fundamentalist Church of Christ minister for nine years. Amoungst the aims of his website Joe writes that he "wants most of all to let other doubting and hurting religious people (like myself years ago) who are losing their faith know that there is life after religion!"
- Debunking Christianity. This Blog has been created for the express purpose of debunking Evangelical Christianity. We are all ex-Christians. Most of us are ex-ministers, and even ex-apologists for the Christian faith..."
- Dennis Diehl was for 26 years a pastor in the Worldwide Church of God. In his articles Dennis addresses the falacies of Fundamentalism and the negative effect it has on the human spirit.
- Deconversion stories from The Skeptical Review. 29 testimonies including many from ex-ministers, missionaries etc.
- 22 deconversion stories from letters to Dennis McKinsey's Biblical Errancy magazine.
- Converts' Corner Where people write in if they have lost their religion (or have been encouraged to come out of the closet) as a result of reading The God Delusion or other Dawkins books. From RichardDawkins.net
- The Official alt.recovery.catholicism Webpages.
- James Buckner describes his deconversion and includes correspondence with his family after they found out he no longer believed. It is a powerful example of someone who decided to confront issues fully and candidly with those who expressed dismay at his loss of faith. He has included his Tough Questions for the Christian Church at his site. Also don't miss these Tough Answers for the Tough Questions by John Love-Jensen.
- Resource Center for Freedom of Mind. Some ex-Christians, particularly those from fundamentalist backgrounds, have discussed elements of cult phenomena in their churches. Steve Hassan is an ex-Moonie leader and has been involved in educating the public about mind control and destructive cults since 1976. A number of people on the ex-tian mailing list have remarked on how useful they have found Steve Hassan's writings. His site links to Walk Away (see above) and his Cults and Groups of Concern includes the Worldwide Church of God, Alcoholics Anonymous, Jews for Jesus, Marantha Campus Ministries and many others.
- Dr. Marlene Winell, specialist in recovering from religious indoctrination, author of Leaving the Fold. Hear her talk in this windows media file from Freethought Radio.
- Non-Believer Former-Members of the Worldwide Church of God
- Former Worldwide Church of God - WWCG WebRing
- More deconversion stories from reciprocal links.
- Ex-Muslim Testimonies and Ex-Muslims' Survey. As Steve Hassan (above) observed, a successful way of seeing the problems with one's own religious views is to see the parallels in a belief system that one is not adverse to criticism of. Also see Faith Freedom International - a site created by ex-Muslims to help Muslims leave Islam.
- Former Christian Priests and Missionaries who have Embraced Islam.
- Testimonies of Jews who returned. Stories from born-Jews who converted to Christianity (often at the hands of the "Jews for Jesus" organisation), describing why they finally left Christianity, returning to the religion of their birth.
- Charles Kluepfel An ex-Catholic examines the liberal side of Christianity.
- Benefit of the Doubt by Dave LF.
- AT LIBERTY Liberty Graduates Tell Their Stories. A site for Liberty Graduates who have significantly changed their beliefs after graduating from Liberty Baptist College or Liberty University. By Glen Draeger.
- Fraser Valley Ex Christians blog.
- QUESTIONING An Examination of Christian Belief.
- Winston Wu describes what it's like to combine Christian fundamentalism with mental health problems and how he recovered from them both.
- Escape Religion by Scott R. Stahlecker. (Also see my review of his book "How to Escape Religion Guilt Free")
- Why I’m Not a Christian by Jon Host.
- Set Free from Jesus by Mark Smith. Amusing and thought provoking! Don't miss Contra Craig.
- Einstein explains why he rejected religion. I realise that Einstein was of Jewish descent, rather than Christian, but he is often quoted as if he was a theist, so this link is to dispel that mistake.
- The Secular Web. The largest and most heavily visited nontheistic web site on the WWW. You can find vast resources of information about secular thought here. There are writings of notable non-Christians including people who have left Christianity on the historical biographies page. Also of particular interest to ex-Christians is Lives of the Unbelievers.
- Freethought ring list.
- ex-Christian books sold at Internet Infidels bookstore. Also see my main book link.
- Other helpful resources recommended by ex-Christians
- The Unitarian Universalist Association. Some ex-Christians, who have wished to maintain the community and structure of their old Christian fellowship without the dogma, have enjoyed being a part of this non creedal religion. Apparently very laid back and thoughtful - includes liberal Christians, agnostics, atheists and others - and I am told the sacramental drink is coffee....
- Ex-Christian Sites. A collection from the Montana Freethinkers.
- Study Resources.
- Former Creationists. An interesting sideline from Talk Origins. Not all subsequently left Christianity.
- Newsgroups, Mailing lists, Forums and other discussion
groups for ex-Christians.
- Ex-tian This list is for and about ex-Christians. Hot topics here include coming out of the closet as an ex-Christian, how to deal with the family around Easter and Christmas, etc.
- Leaving Born Again Fundamentalist Christianity E-Mail List This consists of ex-fundamentalists and those who are interested in walking away from born again fundamentalism or who aren't sure and have questions about whether to leave. This is a support group and is not intended to take you away from spiritual beliefs in which you are comfortable and in which you wish to stay. This list was set up by Mike McClellan who introduces his reasons for leaving fundamentalist Christianity which also leads to his website born again fundamentalism exposed.
- Walk Away from Fundamentalism Forum
- Recovering from Religion Discussion Forum (a moderated, Christian-free forum).
- Ex-Christian.net open forums. In particular see Testimonies of Former Christians.
- exChristian email group.
- XCharismatics From the mailing list intro: "I've spoken in tongues, healed and been healed through the laying on of hands, heeded prophesies given to me by others, been subjected to hours long exorcisms, and was taught to beat my own children in order to exorcise them. I've been out of the Movement for some twenty years now and I still wake up in a cold sweat and a frustrated rage over what was done to me and my family. If any of this rings true to you, then maybe we should talk."
- Exit Fundyism
- Association of Former Pentecostals Discussion Forums
- Ex-Christian Support
- How to Escape Religion forum
- Ex-ICC Member's Discussion Forum This forum exists to provide a gathering place for ex-members of the International Churches of Christ, also known as the Boston Movement and the Crossroads Movement. In addition, family and friends of current ICC members are welcome to participate here. Current ICC members are free to read the forum, but are not allowed to post.
- soc.atheism - provides a forum for discussion of the social aspects, ramifications, and benefits of being an atheist. Also discussed is what leads one to atheism.
- "Tell us your story". Deconversion discussions from "Christian Biblical Errancy Debate" forum.
- alt.recovery.religion
- alt.recovery.catholicism
- ExCatholic - Leaving Roman Catholicism.
- alt.recovery.fundamentalism
- alt.recovery.christian.abuse
- Coming out of the Atheist closet.
- Leaving Christianity - a discussion board in the SF Bay area
- Also don't miss the Internet Infidels Discussion Forum. Particularly (for ex-Christians) see the "Secular Lifestyle & Support Forum"
If any of these links below don't work for your browser, or your server does not have any of the newsgroups, then you may wish search for them at Google Groups (was Deja News).
- Meetups - Meet others like yourself for
informal chat.
- Ex-Catholic Meetups. Arrange meetups with other local Ex-Catholics to discuss leaving the Church and what you believe now.
- Ex-Protestant Meetup. Meetup with other local people who have left Protestant Christianity and discuss the virtues of your previous faith, what you believe now, and using the fervor that used to go into your faith.
- Ex-Christian Scientists Meetup. Meetup with other local people who have left Christian Science.
- Ex-Jesuit Meetup. Meetup with other local ex-Jesuits to discuss what they have been doing since leaving the Society and whether The Spiritual Exercises continue to influence their lives.
- Ex-Mormon Meetup. Meetup with other former members of the LDS church.
Meetup is a free service that organizes local gatherings about anything, anywhere.
And relatedly...
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- The Hundredth Sheep by Curt van den Heuvel.
- Kim Walker's Atheism and Philosophy Articles. ** Well recommended! ** (Note that this is the version from the Internet Archive as my original link to Kim's site died).
- The Lowdown on Christianity - Why You Don't Want to Teach It To Your Kids
- www.drinkme.net
- Secular Spirituality. " Secular Spirituality strives to be a supportive and informative resource for people who are seeking to cultivate a nontheistic, world-centered spirituality."
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Interactive Area
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If you want to leave a message for everyone to see, then please sign
my guestbook. Note that if you are writing to convince me that
Christianity is true, please check that I have not already discussed
your ideas to your satisfaction on my
pages or in my feedback
discussions.
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How consistent are your beliefs? Check your Tension Quotient! |
If you used to be active in an atheist organisation and considered yourself well-read in arguments against Christianity and yet subsequently became a Christian, I would be very interested if you could email me to explain, or put resources that convinced you in the guestbook if you would prefer to stay anonymous. See Asymmetry of Conversion for the background to this question.
If you are an ex-minister then you may wish to at the Freedom From Religion Foundation Inc. Dan is currently engaged in writing a book about former clergy who are now unbelievers. He is also an ex-minister and ex-missionary who has written a popular book about his deconversion (excerpts are available). I wrote to him in December 1999 to enquire about the progress of this and to maybe give him some more leads. He replied that he has over 20 stories so far, and is hoping to get a few more. The ones he has represent a wide cross section of belief: Baptist, Roman Catholic priest, Seventh Day Adventist, Pentecostal, Episcopal, Church of Christ, and so on. Dan may well be interested in your story of why you are an ex-Christian and ex-member of the clergy.
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