In the old days, when I was much younger than I am now, and still in the service of a hearty young adventuress named Ms.Lara Croft, things got interesting from time to time. You see, Ms.Croft was a rather fetching young thing who sent a flutter about my rickety old nerves on more than one occasion, I can tell you. Many were the days when she'd be leaping about in the mansion practising for her next archaeological trip. Very energetic and very spirited. "Tea, Ms. Croft?" I'd say, but she hardly paid the slightest attention. I'd have to follow her round and round the house until the tea got as cold as could be. Then I'd have to go and fetch another pot and find her all over again. It was rather a pain. I dare say a tea cosy would have been in order.

She was rather like that nice young man Dr. Jones (whom I served tea to once, y'know. . . ). They both shared the same compulsion to run off to the other side of the world and go looking for ancient artefacts in hidden temples and ruins. I always asked her why she didn't just settle down and find a nice young man. . . but that was young Lara - always on the go. . .such a rumbustuous young lady! Funnily enough, there always seemed to be many more men hankering after Ms.Croft than Dr. Jones. . . except the time when the entire Archaeological Institute was invited to the Earl of Doncaster's wedding. . .

It was round about that time when they made a computer game about Ms. Croft. Tomb Raider, they called it. I can still remember it now. It caused quite a stir back then, there's no doubt about it. The basic idea was to accompany Ms.Croft on one of her expeditions, controlling her actions and helping her find her way. It all sounded a little absurd. I mean why didn't they just read about her exploits at the Institute? Its what her father would have wanted. . .