11:00 HOW DO THEY DO THAT? More seemingly impossible feats explained: How to win the European Cup, how to lose graciously, how to stop your arm shooting up when the ball goes out of play.
12:00 KIDS' HOUR: 12:00 - SPOT - Nicky Butt on skincare 12:15 - SUPERTED - The number 10 doesn't want to let the fans down again, but can he regain his superpowers before the new season starts? 12:30 - THE FLINTSTONES - Neanderthal fun with Roy Keane and David Beckham
13:00 FILM: I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE David Beckham's wedding video.
14:30 THE BOOK PROGRAMME Alec Ferguson talks about his favourite reads of last season, starting with Great Expectations and ending up with Paradise Lost.
15:30 THE TRAVEL SHOW A must for all fans this week as we show you how to get to Manchester.
16:00 TALES OF THE UNEXPECTED Keane makes a clean tackle, Neville confesses to touching the ball last before it went out and nobody appeals for a penalty when Cole is tackled in the box. (repeat)
17:00 WATCHDOG What are your rights if you spend a fortune on something that doesn't do the job it was intended for? Anne Robinson takes Poborski and Cruyff back to the shop. PLUS have you been overcharged for the new Second Class Stam?
17:30 CAN'T SHOOT, WON'T SHOOT Today's celebrity guests are Andy Cole and Teddy Sheringham.
18:00 ROUGH JUSTICE A special report on a throw-in that the referee gave the wrong way in last season's home match against Arsenal. (continues tomorrow)
19:00 TOP GEAR Teenage fans show off their favourite replica shirts. (1 of 10)
19:30 WIN, LOSE OR DRAW Quiz. Alec Ferguson and his team take on all comers at Old Trafford. (Subsequent programmes may be subject to delay/cancellation in the event that Man U are losing or drawing after 30 minutes and need additional time to catch up/scrape a victory.).
20:00 FILM: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY Paul Scholes, Andy Cole and Phil Neville have an adventure.
22:00 EUROTRASH A look at some of the teams United have failed to beat in their quest for European Champions League glory. This week: Galatasaray.
22:30 WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY? A petulant Fergie discusses a throw-in decision with the referee's assistant