With today's society becoming increasingly more violent towards women, individuals are seeking means of protecting themselves. This program is designed to give an insight on how to become more defensive in protecting yourself from potential danger. By being physically and mentally ready you can prevent yourself from becoming a victim.
Note: although this document is more intended for women, many sections equally apply to men so it is worth all to read.
Also, this document is not intended to make you paranoid or house bound, but to give you tips on what to do if you are VERY unlucky.
Firsts let's realize a few things:
The time of day or locality does not always mean you are safe from harm. Broad daylight in your home can be just as much of a possibility for an assault as walking to your car in the night in some dark place.
Next, the rape/assault criminal knows no age difference, physical appearance or race. Anyone can be a victim.
Some situations, of course, are more dangerous than others. What then is the best way to defend yourself from this? AVOIDANCE.
Dangerous Situations
Avoid potentially dangerous situations:
Walking alone at night even in neighborhoods considered safe.
Riding an empty bus or subway at night alone.
HITCHHIKING. This includes accepting rides from both Male and Female.
Parking your car where it could be very dark at night.
Defense
There are a few ways that one can defend them selves in a potential assault situation:
Run
The best thing to do is run. When you feel that the chance of an assault could be very possible, run away. If you can get out of the area or away from your assailant, do so. Run into a busy place of business (petrol station, store, office building, etc.).
Can you run?
What is it that most women wear to work? Heels: going to and from work try wearing something that you can run in. Change your shoes at work. If you have to wear heals or shoes try to carry them until you reach your destination. One, you cannot run far or fast in them. Two, by carrying them you have just given yourself a weapon of self-defense.
Talking
The next best thing to try and do is talk them out of it. By staying calm and just talking to them can actually buy you time to think of how you are going to defend yourself. It may make them think twice and scare them off in fear of being caught. It can buy you time until someone happens along. In other words, sometimes rational, calm thinking can save you from the assault.
Defending Yourself
The final thing you can do is defend yourself. Why would this be the last resort? The reason is because the majority of the time the assailant is bigger and stronger. So if you are able to prevent the assault by the other means that means the risk of bodily harm is reduced.
Car Jacking
If someone tries to force you into your car DO NOT get into the car with them. IF they do get you into the car then run into a wall, parking meter anything you can to bring attention to what is going on. If the assailant has you in your car once he gets you to a remote location he will probably NOT let you live. If your children are in the back seat ensure you have gone over a plan way before you ever get caught in this situation so that they know to jump out and run also. Keeping your children prepared now can prevent them from also being a victim in the future.
How should a woman defend herself will be covered a little later, firsts let's look at RAPE.
Rape!
Probably one of the most feared words in the female's vocabulary. It doesn't have to happen. Awareness and common safety practices can keep you from becoming a victim.
The Basic 4 Types of Rape
Date Rape (One of the most common)
This usually occurs at the conclusion of a date, where the man feels he should get more than just a kiss for the privilege of his company.
Social Rape
This one is referred to when a teenage girl gets raped. It is usually caused by a boyfriend who wants more than a kiss or heavy petting. The problem is during the teenage years the sexual drive is active. The teenage girl doesn't fully understand the changes going on. The teenage boy who has been through all the stages of kissing, fondling and sometimes oral sex now wants more. They often play on the emotions by saying "you owe it to me" or "how long do you expect for me to wait". The female is given an ultimatum and now feels responsible.
Acquaintance Rape (The most common)
Simple, this is caused by someone the victim knows. It can be a boyfriend, husband, co-worker, boss, etc ...
Stranger Rape (The least common)
This is the most dangerous of all rapes. This is because you cannot anticipate or avoid this type of rape. The rapist is very ruthless and unpredictable. It usually occurs when the women is caught off guard, alone and unaware.
Types of Rapists
Acquaintanc Rapist
The most common rapist, they are the ones the female usually knows. It can be the husband, boss, co-worker, etc... This rapist admits to hearing the women saying no, however presumes she didn't really mean it and that afterwards she'll be grateful sex was forced on her.
Social Rapist
This is the rapist who plays on a females emotions by making her feel she was responsible for the way things turned out. The she teased him into this sexual state.
Non-sadistic Rapist
This rapist is the type that feels all women will turn him down. He has false beliefs that the female actually has feeling for him and desires having sex with him. He usually believes that everything will be all right afterwards.
Opportunistic Rapist
This form of rapist never plans out his rape, however if the opportunity arises, they will take advantage of it.
Power Rapist
Uses his strength to control and force a women into sexual intercourse. The more a victim resists, the more he enjoys it.
Sadistic Rapist
Often commits the Stranger Rape. This rapist is very unpredictable and enjoys the pleasure from the fear and pain of his victims. This rapist is usually full of hate and wants to degrade females by hurting, brutalizing and dehumanizing them. Normally, they randomly select their victims, to them the age, looks, race or size doesn't matter. This rapist has no remorse in killing his victims.
Anger Rapist
This is the one rapist who is very dangerous. He is usually angry at the world and will attack women and men. He derives great pleasure in hurting his victims physically. He is impulsive and probably has a criminal record. He does not care about the victims and has no feelings, period. He commonly kills his victims if he can.
False Thinking
Let's put to rest some false thinking.
The Clothes you wear
Rape is nothing more than a violent crime committed toward women in order to degrade, dehumanize and often brutalize them. It does not matter to the rapist what she is wearing, her age, her ethnic background, her height, her weight or anything else. Rapist feed on their power over their victim NOT what she is wearing! It has nothing to do with how she is dressed.
She enjoyed it!
Sex is enjoyable. Rape is a violent crime where the victim suffers not only during but for sometime afterwards and in some cases for the rest of their life.
Resistance
Most victims do fight back and are often severely beaten for resisting more than they probably should have. Saying that one could have fought back more when fear is controlling the body is ridicules. People can literally be frozen with fear. It is also a tough call to make that decision when one should fight back. Each situation is different. In some cases the rapist may feed on the resistance and it is more dangerous to try to fight back and in other cases they may be planing on killing the victim and one will not survive unless they fight back. The only thing I can say is in either case it is not how hard you fight back or if you fight back but if you survive.
Prevention through Awareness, Preparation & Confidence
How do you prevent yourselves from being a victim?
By being aware, prepared and confident.
Awareness
Be aware and alert of your surroundings of the people around you. Don't be daydreaming or falling asleep. This doesn't mean you have to walk around in total fear. Stay calm and just be aware.
Preparation
Be prepared both physically and mentally. Try to stay physically fit. You need the physical endurance to fight off an attack. Dress appropriately. Wear things that you would be able to defend yourself in. Stay mentally alert, think about you would do if a certain situation came up. Have your purse ready, you may have to use it or items inside it, so know the items inside and what could possibly be used as a weapon, and how you could best use those items.
Confidence
How do we gain the confidence we need? Being able to defend yourself will make you confident. The next would be knowing some defensive techniques to help fend off would be attackers. Since most attackers feel that women are defenseless it will catch them off guard when you go into a defensive response and give you one of the most advantageous elements -- SURPRISE. This in itself can at times make the attacker flee. Not wanting to have to fight his victim, he would rather go off and find an easier target. Before you can fight there are a few things you need to know.
Let's talk about key vulnerable attack points. Down the middle of everybody's body, front and back, you will find the most vulnerable points. The less vulnerable points being to the outside of the body.
Starting from the top we have:
The Front
The Back
There are all kinds of places to attack. Let's look at the weapons we have:
Attend regular self defence class. This will ensure you have a large range of self defence techiniques practise and locked into your sub-concisous so if needed you can react and use the correct technique without thought or hesitation.
In self-defense there are 4 important things to remember. Let's call them the 4-R's.
Techniques against a knife attack
It should always be remembered that an assault with a weapon is the deadliest assaults. In most circumstances always do what they want. You should only defend if it looks like your life could be threatened.
When defending yourself against a knife attack remembers that you will probably get cut. Why is this so important? If you believe that you can't be cut, that you are too good, when you do get cut it will cause you to freeze that one split moment. The one split moment that can cost you your life. However if you know and believe that you will probably get cut when it happens you will continue to fight without freezing.
Final key reminders in awareness for both women and children:
There are so many other things that can be covered. The bottom line to all of this is to avoid becoming a victim by being aware of your surroundings and being mentally and physically ready.
Be Safe!
Acknowledgements: This document has been ammended, edited and appended by T.Carpenter from a document found on the web (whose origin we have since forgotten!)
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(c) 12 a.d. 1999
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