Claire aged 19 shares her story with our publication. Each day we communicate with people who are in despair. I had a bad childhood which, I feel, made me turn into a heroin addict at the age of sixteen. Before I was born my mum lost a child at eleven weeks old due to heart failure. Then when I was born my mum had a nervous breakdown in hospital. I was put in the day nursery because she was convinced I was going to die, but because I didn't, she grew to resent me. When I was five my dad left. He was in jail when I was first born. He didn't see me until I was sixteen months old. At five years old I got sexually abused. My mum had got a babysitter to watch me because my granddad was dying in hospital of cancer. That night he died and I got sexually abused. My mum was pregnant at this time. When the child was born she put it up for adoption because she couldn't cope. The man who abused me went to court and got sentenced to two years in prison. After that, my mum and me started to get beaten up of my baby sister's dad all the time. My cousin was also sexually tampering with me as well. At the age of eight I had to put myself in care because my mum was a bad alcoholic. I used to have to get up, get my sister dressed, wash her and take her to nursery. I also had to look after my brother and take him to school. I used to stay at home and clean the house up and cook for them. I also used to look after my uncle's child whilst he was drinking all the time and going out. So, I put myself in care because my mum threw something at my head and I ended up having a big lump on my head at school and I wasn't feeling too well. They were going to send me home but I said no because my mum kept threatening to kill me. I have been in care up until my eighteenth birthday, in and out of different foster homes. In the children's home I had problems because I kept running away. You used to get locked in and you couldn't go out. I got sent to a place in Liverpool, which was alright. I started going on home leave to the care home and my mum's. I moved back home and my mum had split up with her boyfriend. She had another baby in 97' and she was on her deathbed while she was giving birth because she had a bad epileptic fit. She got to stay with the child a week but then he got took of her and put with foster parents. When I moved back to my mum's at fifteen my mum was drinking still, she got worse and kept hitting me. She threw me out on my sixteenth birthday. I moved out and ended staying in a shelter and then on to a hostel. I moved to my cousin's and tried to get off drugs but I relapsed because I couldn't handle the love that she showed me. No one had ever shown me love before and she treat me like a daughter. I couldn't handle it. I then got two flats. My little brother robbed my last flat and I couldn't move back in so I'm now back in a hostel. I have started to get drug counselling and I am seeking other help from a counsellor. I'm now trying to get into a rehabilitation unit. |
