TRAGEDY STRIKES COOPER MARS MISSION

DISASTER struck for a second time at Maranello yesterday, as the "Race to Mars" claimed the life of pilot Stuart Stribling, amid great controversy.

In response to Ferrari's recent Mars landing attempt, the Cooper team have begun a manned flight program of their own. However, it was discovered that Pilot S. Stribling was actually DRUNK while attempting takeoff.

	FIRST SIGN OF TROUBLE   All appears well during take-off, until incredibly, Stribling ACCIDENTALLY switches off the cooper's engines
	DEATHLY SILENCE Losing momentum, the Cooper sails silently back to earth as the watching crowd gasp in horror...

 

	DEADLY IMPACT The cooper crashes heavily into the tarmac...
	...then bounces violently into the nearby catch-fencing...
	...where it becomes caught, and burns ferociously

Captain Stribling had been seen in a nearby bar shortly before the launch. Witnesses claim he had consumed approximately 14 bottles of Mexican beer, before announcing "Right, I'm off to Mars then" and leaving the bar. A spokesman for the Cooper Mars Mission said "We really didn't realise he was drunk... he always acts like that."

 

Despite this setback, the Cooper team maintain that they WILL continue to compete against Ferrari in the race to Mars.

Captain Stribling.

Sadly missed.