Weaponry!

 

No Responsibility is taken for events connected with the following info.

 

'Gorilla' Bananarchy Tactics

Every good bananarchist has at least twenty pounds of bananas in their fridge. All bananarchy weapons listed below are the result of much research, preparation, and experimentation on the properties of bananas. Should you decide to become a bananarchist, I suggest you purchase a book on bananas.

The Banana Blade

The banana blade is a dangerous weapon in the hand of a skilled bananarchist.

Materials:
- 1 Frozen Banana
- 1 Carving Knife

You are probably asking yourself "A carving knife?! Why don't I just use that, instead of making a knife out of a frozen banana?!". YOU INSOLENT FOOL!! Obviously you have a lot to learn about the advantages of Bananarchy!

The banana blade is far superior to a regular knife. It can be designed quickly for the job at hand, and if you are ever caught, it IS edible.
Once the banana has been frozen solid, you may then carve it into the desired shape. Remember: The banana blade must be used quickly before it thaws.

The Banana Mine

Watch where you step!
A banana peel is a very inconspicuous weapon. The common tourist may mistake it for a simple pile of refuse, a discarded food item but beware, the banana mine can cause serious damage if positioned correctly in a highly trafficked area.
Ha Ha Ha! If only Fidel Castro had known about Bananarchy...

...Ha Ha Ha...
(maniacal laugh)
Zeducious Monk

The Banana Bomb

The banana bomb is a stable high explosive, so it can be jarred or dropped without exploding. To detonate it, you could use a flame, although an electric detonator works much better

Materials:

Usage:
Connect an electric detonator to the Banana Bomb.
Stay at least 20 feet away from the bomb when detonating.

Shrapnel Grenade

The Shrapnel Grenade is difficult to make, but can blow through almost anything! WARNING: This weapon should only be used in the hands of an experienced Bananarchist!

Materials:

Procedure:

  1. Mash up the three bananas with the Potato Masher.
  2. Form the banana mush into a ball. Put nails in it if you're really devious >:)
  3. Place the ball of banana mush into the Liquid Nitrogen until completely frozen (use gloves).
  4. Drill a large hollow into the frozen banana ball.
  5. Jam the banana bomb inside (don't worry.. it won't explode)
  6. Connect the electric detonator, and you're ready to do some damage!

Stay FAR away from this sucker when it blows, or you're liable for a lobotomy!

Banana Pudding Napalm

Banana Pudding Napalm is a highly flammable mixture, and when it's finished burning, you've got banana cookies!
Materials:
- 5 Unpeeled Bananas
- 1 Blender
- 1 Container

Mix up the bananas in the blender, until it forms into a thick paste. Pour the mixture into the container.

Usage:
Pour the pudding on the intended surface, and light it up!

Banana Thermite

Banana Thermite is created from a chemical reaction between bananas, and aluminum.
Materials:
- 1 unpeeled Banana
- 30 cm square sheet of aluminum foil
- a sparkler (the kind you get on birthday cakes)

Wrap the banana entirely with the aluminum foil. Push the sparkler halfway through the banana.

Usage:
Place the banana on the intended surface, and light the sparkler. The substance created will melt through anything! (including your tongue, Greg)

Fun Ideas for Banana Explosives!

1) Mix pressure sensitive banana bombs in with regular bananas at the local grocery store!
2) Monkeys looove bananas!
3) Make candles out of your banana bombs, and give them to your neighbors!
4) Disguise a Banana Bomb as a cake, using Banana Pudding Napalm as icing. Top it off with the candles in #3