Michael Ball, voted best musical artist of the past 21 years, talks in depth for the first time about the illness that almost ruined his career.
 
 
 
 
 

I nearly lost everything

At midnight on Millennium Eve, Michael Ball will be singing to millions at a concert in Kuala Lumpur that will be broadcast live throughout Malaysia.  But next day he'll be off, with his partner Cathy McGowan, for a holiday that he's learnt the hard way is essential for his health and career.

Michael was just 22 when he experienced the first hint of health problems that sideswiped his career.  At the time he'd been plucked from the obscurity of the chorus to become the lead in the West End hit Les Miserables.  "It was only my second professional job and I was getting rave reviews, so I did what most guys my age would and lived every minute of it" he says.

But an attack of tonsillitis meant Michael had to take three days off.  "Afterwards I expected to go on a before but I just felt exhausted", he says.  Because he hadn't given his body time to recover, Michael was developing glandular fever.  Unaware of this, he forced himself to go on working.

"Then I started having anxiety attacks on stage and kept forgetting my lines," he recalls.  "Soon it was happening 10 or 12 times a day".  Eventually Michael's glandular fever was diagnosed and he had to take eight weeks off.  "After my time off, I felt worse than ever and that's when the ME kicked in," he says.  "Now I realise I'd abused my body so much in the past that it was shouting at me to stop".

"I was dragging myself around.  I'd be OK for an hour or so, then I'd feel I couldn't breathe.  I felt so vulnerable on stage".  Reluctantly Michael decided to leave the show for good.  "I'd had so much going for me and it had slipped through my fingers," he says.

"Then I became agoraphobic.  I didn't want to do anything or see anyone.  I was deeply depressed."

Michael didn't work for nine months.  Then his luck changed.  First, musical impresario Cameron MacIntosh offered him a part in Phantom Of The Opera.  "I was feeling better so I thought I'd go for it", he says.

Then Michael, now 37, met Cathy McGowan, the glamorous older woman who was to become his partner.  "Cathy changed my life," he says.  "She taught me to look after myself.  Left to my own devices I'm not very sensible.  I still push myself too far, but the difference is these days I'm better at switching off".

Now Michael loves being with Cathy and her grandson Connor, born in May to her daughter Emma.  "I adore the baby", says Michael.  "I'd been thinking of starting a family but I've done it by proxy.  I feel just as involved, but I don't have to change my life - which is perfect as it is".

Sue Malins
for Best Magazine