My Diary

Outward - Friday 8th June

Got my kit together, and tidied my house in case my cousins come and house-sit for me. Caught a taxi into Poole, and a coach to Heathrow terminal 3 via the A30 to avoid the M25 (a good trip despite being sat next to a natterer on her way to Majorca).

Terminal 3 has a middle-eastern feel to it. I particularly remember seeing an elaborately-dressed family having trouble with the escalator.

Day 1 - Saturday 9th June

It has to be said that Ethiopian Airlines are exceeding expectations. We have had several drinks, a 4-course meal, and I have just been woken up somewhere over Egypt at 4:50am BST with a steaming hot towel better than I've had after any curry!

I had first been sat next to a Scottish lady called Lorna and her sweet 4-year-old daughter Abigail, complete with Barbie doll ("look - no pants!"), but they had to move as we were sat by an emergency exit. They now live in Lilongwe, but still pop back to Scotland regularly.

The transit lounge at Addis Ababa got full, so they decided to call us through to the gate two hours before departure time. At least that area was non-smoking, and we could watch the showers outside.

For the last hop to Harare, we now had a pretty good idea of who was going to be in our group. Most of them seem to be more travelled than I am, and all seem friendly and sociable. There are even a few ex-SJA officers.

We landed at Harare at 16:50 local time (GMT+2), which I make 26 hours elapsed from Poole bus station.

MY BAG DIDN'T ARRIVE! I held up the rest of the group while somebody was found to man the lost luggage counter and fill out a Property Irregularity Report.

We drove to the Selous Hotel and were allocated rooms. A shower was most welcome after the long journey, and Peter my room mate very kindly lent me a clean change of clothes.

Day 2 - Sunday 10th June

While the group had a look around the centre of Harare, Chris, the tour leader, took me with him to the local Makro, and I stocked up on essential clothes and a sleeping bag, plus a bag to hold it all in. I spent all but $15 of my remaining money. Fortunately Chris has offered to lend me some money that I can repay in the UK, so I shouldn't miss out on any of the excursions.

No luck either when I rang the airport on the number I was given: they had notified LHR and ADD, but no response had been received. I told them to send it to Lusaka if it turned up.

We drove to Chinhoyi and the camp site just beyond. The tents went up OK but ours had a dodgy zip, so we swapped with the tour leader. Then we went for a walk to a cave lagoon and also to some other caves nearby. After that, a round of 3 Castles in the nearby hostelry went down very well, although I'm not sure how they came to Z$170.

Our first camp meal was chicken leg, rice and vegetables eaten around a fluorescent light near the fire. I failed to win the "who is going to be the last sat in just their shirt?" competition. Then it was back over to the pub for another beer and Angola 1-0 Mauritius on the TV (nice midfield skills, shame about the finishing).

Day 3 - Monday 11th June

It turned out that I had bought a 160cm sleeping bag. For those not well-versed in the metric system, I am 175cm tall. No problem at first, but as the night got colder I couldn't tuck everything in. I also had to go to the loo in the middle of the night: must take an empty bottle into the tent with me next time! Not a good night's sleep, but breakfast was nice.

We drove to a camp site near Lake Kariba. The site looks very nice, but we had trouble putting the pegs into the ground. In the afternoon, a local lad in a blue boiler suit called Abraham took us on a stroll along the shore of the lake, which turned into a wildlife tour. The highlight was the hippopotami sighting at the end. Well actually it was the shower afterwards.

We were warned that the game might come through the camp site at night on their route for food. We heard some hippos chuntering (sounds like a belch), but they didn't come too close. It was a bit warmer than last night.

Day 4 - Tuesday 12th June

All aboard the bus for a trip to the Kariba Dam. At the end of the road out of the camp we were boarded by an officer at one of the several road blocks that we had hitherto passed through without hindrance. He smiled and asked us all how we were enjoying Zimbabwe: of course we all smiled and said that we were enjoying ourselves, which was true, but one can't help feeling perturbed by the security arrangements. Anyway he didn't find the guns.

The dam was spectacular, as one of the sluice gates was open and over 1500m³/s was pouring through, surplus to the hydro-electric power requirements.

We moved on to the town. I borrowed Z$200 from Terry to buy a phone card, then rang the airport to seek news of my luggage. It had arrived in Harare! Great. Arrangements were made to have it sent on to Lusaka airport, where I could pick it up when I get there. I'm looking forward to a full-size sleeping bag already.

At 4pm we set off from the grounds of a posh hotel on the "HMS Slow Motion" for a cruise on Lake Kariba. Those with binoculars and zoom lenses were the best off for viewing distant elephants, hippos and heron. The lake could easily be a sea surrounded by mountains. We each bought a beer and some "snakes" (snacks) to use up the last of our Zim dollars. The sun setting over the hills near the dam was pretty.

Day 5 - Wednesday 13th June

Having got up at 05:55 to answer the call of nature, Peter suggested that I might as well have a hot shower at the only ones in the camp, a fair trek up the hill. This was most welcome, and I had a shave to boot.

I embarrassed myself when it came to throwing the rolled-up tents on to the roof of the truck: I wasn't strong enough, and hit the window! Was there a secret stash of hammers and tent pegs in the bag that I picked up? Anyway I left it to the bigger guys.

We had to do paperwork to get out of Zimbabwe, and more paperwork plus a whacking great £35 (or $60) visa to get into Zambia.

There was a brief stop at Chirundu to obtain kwacha. This also marked the last of the decent roads as we hit the dirt, and the four-wheel drive came into its own. A river barred our way, which we crossed using a hand-cranked winch ferry.

We first stopped when a loud blare signalled a bull elephant on heat objecting to our presence. It threatened a charge, we moved off, it stopped, we stopped, then it went off in a frustrated huff. Later on we stopped for longer around 100m from a herd of around 30 mothers, some with calves. My little camera couldn't compete with the array of lenses that came out, but I was lent a look through some binoculars.

We arrived at Chongwe camp site. No sooner had we disembarked from the truck than a large elephant took an unhealthily close interest in us. The brave ones took photos, but the local guy was advising staying clear. It approached the truck: Shanta was still inside, and she shut the windows and started filming! The elephant turned its attention to Chris's Explore bag which had been left unattended. It tried to peel the bag like a fruit, then just ate it whole! It was then spat back out. A pity really: Chris was looking forward to faxing Explore to say that all his paperwork had been eaten by an elephant! It gave up eventually.

A tame impala showed up to inspect the visitors. I daren't photograph it as my flash may have gone off and scared it.

Day 6 - Thursday 14th June

Had a decent night's sleep (on my left side at least). Got up at 6am with the others. We left at 7:15am for a game drive in Lower Zambezi National Park. We saw mostly impala, with a few wart hogs and water buck.

It was heavy going, especially fording the Chongwe river. We had to pull out a truck that was stuck from last night, then on the way back we had to wait until another truck attempted the crossing, got stuck, and was pulled out by a local. The occupants sat firm, except for the driver, who got out and pushed along with some of our lads. Water poured out when they opened the doors on dry land. It was a result when we found out that they were Germans, and Terry's video of their attempt to cross the ford was more heartily appreciated for that.

After four days of background processing, I was able to inform Dena that it was the Sensational Alex Harvey Band who covered "Delilah", the original version being by Tom Jones, her favourite hoovering music.

Later, we went back into the park to follow the directions to the "Chongwe Falls" given to us by the local guide. After ½ hour following a circuitous path, we had no luck, and abandoned the search. We figured that they must have been considerably further upstream towards the rift valley escarpment.

Dinner was again very nice but only just enough. This must be a hungry group.

There seems to be considerably more wildlife near the camp than in the park! Why bother getting covered with leaves and twigs in the truck?

Day 7- Friday 15th June

Talk in the camp over breakfast was the roar of the lion that we heard in the night among the usual hippo, baboon and insect noises. None of the animals want conflict with humans, we are told, so provided we stay in groups in the camps and keep out of the way of the elephants, we should be OK.

The group split. Six of us went for a motor (banana) boat ride out of the Chongwe and up the Zambezi, mostly hippo spotting, but also seeing an elephant, two small crocs, and a stork, plus various other birds. It lasted a couple of hours. The others went on a walking safari with an armed park ranger, and didn't see a great deal. Roles could be reversed in the afternoon, but some of us won't bother with the walk and will hit the bar instead.

I came back from the boat ride and had a snooze. When I woke up, the local hippos had decided to come out of the water and sun/cloud themselves on the far shore. One was doing the hippo hokey-cokey, or step aerobics, but taking about 10 minutes for each leg movement.

Our not-so-friendly elephant invaded our camp after lunch, emptied our rubbish bin and sampled our tin foil, which it spat out again. With more groups due in after us, the talk is that it is too dangerous and will be shot.

We saw the other boat trip off and persuaded the barman to leave us a cool box with a supply of tinnies of the local rats' piss. It was so weak that I drank four and could still walk back to camp.

Day 8 - Saturday 16th June

We packed up the camp and set off back to Chirundu and then on to Lusaka, getting there in six hours.

The Eureka camping park is paradise compared with what we have just left: proper toilet blocks, gardens, flowers, a beach volleyball court, and a bar with satellite TV. Apparently the water is hot too!

We had lunch, then I was driven to Lusaka airport to pick up my wayward luggage. Of course they had never heard of it, it wasn't on the computer and the bag wasn't in the lost property room. They were about to fob me off with another delay, but Chris turned on the ire and demanded to speak to the local manager for Ethiopian Airlines, one of whose planes had just landed. She couldn't even ring Harare to find out what had happened! The best they can do is ring Air Zim on Monday, and ring Percy the cook's mobile phone number to let us know. With luck, it will turn up at Lusaka in time for the eclipse when we return to Lusaka the day before. So it's another four nights in my undersized sleeping bag.

We stopped at the shops on the way back. I bought some sweeties including a box of Maltesers to cheer myself up. Others took the opportunity to stock up on cheap booze.

At dinner, Peter took a shine to some gin, and knocked back the best part of the bottle. This more or less knocked him out, and he sat in the circle with his head in his knees. Eventually Janette and Dena carted him back to the tent, where he was wrapped up and left to sleep it off.

This camp site labels its facilities "Bruce" and "Sheila". The only problem is that Africans don't know which is which, so one of my pees was interrupted by a black woman rushing to the loo.

Day 9 - Sunday 17th June

Relieved when morning came after an uncomfortably cold night. I'll definitely lay off the beer from now on.

We packed up camp and went shopping at the Shoprite in Lusaka (a South African chain: no woolly hats, sun cream or insect repellent). We headed for Kafue National Park, but the road was pot-holed, and the journey took longer than expected. The delay did mean that we arrived at Lake Itezhi-tezhi just after sunset, a beautiful view.

The camp site is the Musungwa Safari Lodge, with great views over the lake and good facilities, which are always welcome. We even had the luxury of using the sofas in the lodge building.

Day 10 - Monday 18th June

We had an early breakfast, then we set off for a game drive in Kafue N.P. It was still quite cold: I had 3 shirts and a fleece on and still took a long while to warm up. The animals apparently weren't impressed either, and after a promising early view of some water buck there wasn't a lot worth seeing. We had a natural break at a rough airstrip, and joked that Ethiopian Airlines could start to use it instead of Harare! Eventually we came across a large mixed gathering of impala, water buck and zebra, with a gnu lurking in the background. After that, we had further sightings of impala, plus occasional monkeys, wart hogs, and a caracal. Also seen were hyrax, bush buck (Bambi) and hartebeeste.

It now being a week into the holiday, my 7 days ration of clothes bought in Harare needed refreshing, so I set a trend for hand-washing in a bowl. it was a hot breezy day, ideal for drying should you be lucky enough to find space on a washing line. I also had a shower before lunch, beating the rush that the other recently-arrived Explore truck might have generated.

A trip to a local hot spring was arranged for 3pm onwards. Some of the girls went prepared to bathe, but it turned out to be a boiling spring high in dissolved salts (MgSO₄ or NaHCO₃?), and you could hardly keep your hand in it for any length of time.

The journey was another opportunity to wave at the locals, who always seem glad to see us, especially the younger ones.

The suggestion that we leave for a more ambitious game drive at 6am tomorrow wasn't greeted with great enthusiasm. I'm feeling short of sleep anyway.

Day 11 - Tuesday 19th June

The early night paid off as I had no trouble waking up at 5am: well actually, Peter getting up stirred me into action. It can be handy sharing a tent with an early riser.

We were on the road by 6am to try and get deeper into Kafue NP and find all this missing wildlife. At first it was patchy, the highlight being two storks with red, black and yellow beaks, and two cranes. Oh for a zoom lens.

Then it went silent for over an hour. Seeing a handful of vehicles going the other way wasn't a good sign.

Eventually we went down a side track and found a charming family of elephants, including a baby. The big one wasn't entirely comfortable with our presence, but we were able to take photos at our leisure.

Turning for home, we came upon a herd of around 10 elephants of various sizes, about 100m away at the top of the rise. We slowed down, then stopped as one, presumably male, turned towards us. It started trotting down the hill, then broke into a full charge. We started to reverse, which normally does the trick, but this jumbo was committed to the attack. Even blasting the truck's air horn had no effect. By now, some of the other elephants were starting to join in, which was distinctly worrying.

There was a thud as the elephant nutted the front of our truck, the blow softened by our reverse motion. I thought that it then dragged the nose to one side, but apparently it had backed off and gave us the opportunity to drive off to the side, fortunately on to decent ground, turn round, and hot foot it back down the track and away. We all had to hold on tight as we bounced along, only stopping when we were well clear. Nicholas the driver was shaking as he got out, and became very excited when he held aloft a section of tusk that had snapped off in the bars on the front of the truck. It must have been painful for the elephant, as it's like a tooth, but as both ends were broken, it must have had a similar encounter recently.

We gathered around Chris as he replayed the video footage that he had taken from the cab. It was brilliant, but ended abruptly when he dived for cover as he thought that the side of the cab was about to be charged, and he dived into the next seat.

An alternative route out of the park was chosen, and another group of elephants that we saw didn't look too friendly either, so we didn't hang around.

Chris's theory was that poaching had deprived the herd of one of its members, and being sensitive and grieving animals, they were agitated by anyone in a vehicle. Come to think of it, we did see some dodgy geezers in a pick-up on our route that had large nets in the back of their truck: Chris thought that they might be hunters. South Africans were notorious hunters in the days when the park allowed it. Any poachers probably came from the nearby villages.

A beer by the pool was the order of the afternoon (although we weren't supposed to use it really, it's for the posh paying guests).

It was Robert's birthday, so Percy baked him an iced sponge. We all sang to him, with Steve's tenor descant particularly impressive. Most retired to the bar afterwards, but I only managed to stay awake long enough for one.

Day 12 - Wednesday 20th June

Couldn't get back to sleep after 5am, so I got up early and wrote my notes up as first the moon, and shortly afterwards the sun, rose. We planned to leave for Lusaka at 7am, but didn't get going until 7:45. It didn't help when Nicholas stopped when he spotted another Trans-Africa truck led by a pretty Frenchette: there was agitation among the ranks. We reached Lusaka at 3pm.

Our broken water pump meant that we couldn't get into town until one of the other Explore trucks turned up.

I was told that I could buy a phone card in one of the supermarkets. However, having waited five minutes at the kiosk and then initially receiving directions to where I could buy a cellphone card, I was told that I could buy them at the post office next door - but it shut 5 minutes ago.

Instead, I was directed to a phone/fax/Email centre, where I could make a metered call. The woman at Ethiopian Airlines who was dealing with my luggage was of course on holiday today, and would be in from 9 to 12 tomorrow. I'm going to have to ask Percy nicely to use his phone.

A combination of the stress and sitting in the sun on the bus ride had given me a headache, so I went straight to bed after tea.

Eclipse day - Thursday 21st June - day 13

The three Explore trucks intended to head for a road that ran more or less along the centre line, but it was so rough that we decided to go back to a site near where the Great North Road crossed the centre line. It was a camp site, for which the truck fee for the day was $35. There were surprisingly few people around: most must have stayed in Lusaka or at the camp site where we were last night, the Eureka Camping Park.

It took a while to spot the effect of first contact: we think our timing of 13:18 was out. The first chunk out of the sun was noticed at around 13:45.

The pinhole camera experiment with an empty Pringles jar worked quite well. I managed to get a winking eye effect using closely-spaced fingers.

As the moon covered more and more of the sun, its burning effect lessened and shadows became sharper. Crescents could be seen beneath the tree that we were encamped around.

With only a thin crescent left, at about 15:00, it was decidedly dim, but it was strange to have the light source high in the sky. My camera and others switched the automatic flash on as I took a picture of the scene.

I wanted to take a couple of pictures during totality, which meant flash, so Peter and I withdrew to one side so as not to annoy the others. First the horizon went dark, then it suddently dimmed as the first diamond ring formed and faded. Then it was totality, and off with the eclipse glasses that I had been wearing up till now.

It was beautiful. The corona encircled the black orb that was the moon. There was a bright prominence at around 2 o'clock on the dial. Yet it didn't go completely dark. I suppose that, as there wasn't a cloud to be seen all day, there was enough light in the corona to faintly illuminate the earth. The only other celestial body that could be seen was Jupiter to the lower-left - no stars were visible.

The second diamond ring was better than the first, because we were looking at the sun in darkness when it peeped out. I took a photo, but probably missed the best of it by looking through the viewfinder. Just before that, the western horizon became bright as we were still in darkness. It was all over, and we breathed again. Totality had lasted just over three minutes from about 15:10. A few minutes after, it was as if we were bathed in a searchlight.

There was a tremendous atmosphere during the whole episode. The insects had started chirping as the light lowered, there were a few cheers at totality, and about ten minutes after it was all over, the road was alive with cars and trucks heading north out of Lusaka with horns blaring and people waving at us as they passed. A round of beer was enjoyed. The only downside was a European idiot spaced out on LSD who kept coming over to us, burbling in English, and interfering with our equipment. His mates dragged him away before we flattened him.

Day 14 - Friday 22nd June

Nobody got much sleep as the festival/rave in the next field kept going until 3:40am, by which time the slow love songs had driven people away. I did poke my head in at around midnight on my way back from the bar, but I didn't think it worth paying what they wanted to charge me.

I entrusted my postcards to Carole as the group went shopping. I shared a taxi to Lusaka airport with Catherine, a Trans-Africa manager for Zambia who was also on the trail of some wayward luggage. It took ages chasing around the buildings to find somebody who could unlock the lost property office at Lusaka. When we did, the bag was not there. Big surprise. The girl at Ethiopian who we had entrusted to chase it up was not in today, and their office at the airport was unattended. I made a further angry telephone call to their office, and they undertook to get my bag on the same Addis Ababa - Heathrow flight as me. I'll believe it when I see it. I suppose that it was only fair that we shared the taxi cost: at least I got the receipt for the full amount. It did clean me out of kwacha, so I changed another $20 near the Shoprite, and treated myself to a blanket while I was at it.

We were running late, so instead of stopping on route for lunch, we ate fast food at Nando's on Cairo Road. Janette was delighted with her pizza.

It was a long drive on good roads to our overnight camp at Petauke. I tried a "shower", which was a dribble of cold water that soon stopped at an inconvenient stage. I'll have the second half of my shower tomorrow.

Day 15 - Saturday 23rd June

The blanket purchase has already paid off as a cold night was successfully fended off, possibly my best night's sleep so far.

We had breakfast among the chickens before setting off to Sough Luangwa. The scenery en route included granite outcrops called kopjes ("copies").

We called in on the Shoprite in Chipata. It was blazing hot, so I didn't bother investigating the local market. Peter did, and came back feeling unwell. He placed a wet hanky on his head, and I fanned it with my baseball cap. He soon felt a little better. Our doctor was also keeping an eye on things.

On the way out of town I snapped an unusual shop, but a local man remonstrated with me for photographing the locals. I should have waved an apology, but instead I tried to indicate that I was photographing the shop, a gesture that came out wrong and made matters worse. The bus drove on, but I hope I'm not a marked man when we return there in a few days.

The last three hours of the drive to Flat Dogs camp was on a rough undulating road, so we were all relieved to arrive. The tents went up in dusk, then time for a nice shower, a bottle of beer in their expensive bar, a nice fried beef and pasta meal, and an early night.

Day 16 - Sunday 24th June

Last night was about 15ºC warmer than previous nights, so I spent much of it topless and lightly-covered by my sleeping bag. We had to get up before the crack of dawn to be on the road by 6:10am for our first game drive in South Luangwa National Park.

In general, the animals and birds seemed less skittish, and hung around longer to pose. We saw the inevitable impala, water and common buck, puku, elephants, hippos, zebra, a couple of Thornicroft's giraffe (with the sun behind, so I couldn't photograph them), and yellow-billed stork. On the way over the bridge out of the park, the largest crocodile of the holiday so far was seen sunning itself on a sand bank in the middle of the river. No sign of any big cats: this is what we are all waiting for.

We went out for an afternoon game drive, the most notable additions to what we saw this morning were more giraffe and kudu closer-up.

We had a run-in with an evening safari as we headed home. I thought that the two small pick-up trucks had pulled over to let us through, as another had just done, but in fact they were watching a big cat. When it slunk away, we were accused of scaring it by not turning our engine off. It had spots, the consensus being that it was a small leopard.

Day 17 - Monday 25th June

This morning's crack-of-dawn game drive was in an open pick-up truck. At first it was fruitless, but eventually the advantage of the quieter vehicle was seen as we could stop closer to the game without scaring it off. It was nippy at first, but as the sun rose it wasn't uncomfortable to keep the fleece and woolly hat on while the truck was moving. Highlight for me this morning were two flocks of Lilian's Lovebirds, a splash of green that took off from the bushes as we drove up to them. Two bee-eaters nuzzling on a twig were also captivating.

We had lunch on our return, then I caught up on my kip, and rinsed a few of the undies that actually fitted (top tip for buying clothes in Zimbabwe: buy "large" if you normally buy "medium" at home). Stuff dries quickly in the African sun.

At 4pm we set off for the long-awaited night safari. I had to get ready in a rush, because I had been granted the luxury of my own tent just before. It was one rejected by Terry and Shanta because of a faulty zip, but it seemed to work OK. Terry offered to put the flysheet on for me while I was out, which he very kindly did.

We went out in a Land Rover with a white freelance guide called Tony and a "spotter" called Saizie (or similar). Tony came out to Zambia to do some contract work, and never felt the inclination to settle back in the UK. We saw the usual suspects at first, then as darkness fell we pulled over for a cup of squash and a pit stop.

The drive resumed in darkness, with the spotter boy standing at my side in the front passenger seat, sweeping a hand-held search light across the bush. They said that they don't leave the light dwelling on the diurnal animals, but the nocturnal animals have a complex eye structure that can cope with the light in their eyes.

We saw another vehicle stopped and taking flash photos, then it turned down a side road. We followed it and saw that it was tracking our first definite leopard. The animal was sauntering along a gully as a truck on either side spotlighted it. We let it be and rejoined the road.

We drove off to our northernmost point, just seeing a few jennets. Then, as we rounded a bend, Tony killed the engine and lights as another leopard came around the corner. Tony said that if we kept calm, it may come near us. Well, it walked right up to the front of the vehicle, in full view of the spotlight, then turned off to one side and marked its territory in the bush. It was nice to be sat flanked by two others in the front seats: I wasn't going to be the first course on the menu! A terrific sighting, inevitably the highlight of the drive, making the extra expense well worthwhile.

Because of the size of the vehicles, we had split our group in two. The others had seen lions a long way off, and had been threatened by an elephant. Stories were discussed in the bar, which we were driven to for safety reasons to avoid elephants in the camp.

Day 18 - Tuesday 26th June

All but three of us went on a final morning game drive. I was enjoying having my own tent too much to leave it early, so I had a lie-in until 6:30am, then helped to take down the tents of the others while they were out.

They came back and said that they had seen a hyena and some good birds, so they were happy. We settled the bar and excursion bills, then set off on the bumpy road back to Chipata.

Ten minutes out of Flat Dogs, we met the other Explore group going the other way. Some of them remembered me from when I shared their truck into Lusaka.

We arrived at the Yellow Chicken camp site just outside Chipata. It was a large well-grassed area overlooking a lake, with rolling hills in the background, no other trucks present, and cold cheap beer: whar more could one ask for? A pleasant evening was had in the company of hosts Steve from Leicestershire and Cathy from Australia.

Day 19 - Wednesday 27th June

I felt the need to expend some energy, so I got up a little earlier and attempted to jog round to the far side of the lake so I could wave back at the others. Sadly the lake was longer than anticipated, and I was going to run out of time and puff if I'd continued, so I abandoned the plan. It was still a nice run, though. Time for a scalding shower before departure.

We exited Zambia and crossed into Malawi. The surprise at immigration was that yellow fever certificates were required. I returned to the truck to fetch mine, but the girl at the table marked "Health" didn't trouble me for it. One or two without certificates got away with it.

My first impressions of Malawi were that the mud huts were of a better quality, verging on brickwork. There were many impressive churches, both Christian and Moslem: clearly much missionary work goes on here.

We stopped off in Lilongwe to change money and have a look around. The first obvious difference became apparent: the street traders are far more pushy, gathering around the truck as soon as it pulled into the car park. Peter and I checked three bureaux de change and picked the one with the best rate. We were given nice new bank notes. I bought a cream doughnut - very nice. Peter bought Portuguese Chicken Spices, and his change included 20 coins of 10 tambala each - a total of 2 kwacha, or 2p, so each coin was worth 0.1p. They looked brand new!

We called in at the Ethiopian Airlines office so that Chris could reconfirm the flights home and I could check on the progress of my luggage. It might even have been put on to a plane to Lusaka but then taken off again! The plot thickens.

We stopped for lunch at the side of the road to Senga Bay. Soon there was a crowd of locals watching us have our picnic. We left stuff behind, which they virtually fought over.

There was a slight alarm as the truck made an inauspicious grating noise, but a quick spot of plate bending cured the problem.

We arrived at Senga Bay on the shore of Lake Malawi. It was just like a seaside resort, with sandy beaches and rocks. The area is barred to the locals, which I would find frustrating if I lived there. The water was too tempting, and I joined four others in going for a swim. Waves crashing in suggested that the water was free of bilharzia (which likes stagnant water). It was just like swimming in the sea, only warmer and better-tasting - lovely! We had a shower afterwards as a precaution.

There was a pleasant chat over a mug of coffee, then we joined the others at the beach bar for Calsberg. It comes in green (lager) or brown (beer), the latter being quite nice. I had two bottles, and could barely walk straight afterwards! At 70p per bottle, I could get rat-assed on a couple of quid! I decided not to resume drinking after dinner, and had an early night just after 9pm.

Day 20 - Thursday 28th June

With nothing specific to get up for, people were up at various times.

A group of us headed for the local market selling wooden crafts. I diverted to try and find a route to a viewpoint over the bay, but there were too many trees in the way, so I gave up and returned to the craft market.

I vowed to purely window shop today, and come back later tomorrow if I wanted anything else. While I was being shown around, a scuffle broke out: a stallholder was apparently demanding payment for an item broken by a local punter, who took exception to this, and a punch-up started. The stallholder even went back to pick up something to use as a weapon, but his brothers tried to drag him away. Apparently, the chief of the tribe will summon the combatants, who will have to pay a deposit, put their case, then the chief decides who is in the right and award the money. I was talked into ordering some key rings that are carved out of wood: my bargaining skills didn't really turn up a great deal. Still, it's something different for everybody.

I had a lazy afternoon, writing some postcards, then later going for another swim in Lake Malawi, followed by a shower.

A quick check on my finances wasn't very promising: there'll be a souvenir cutback!

Day 21 - Friday 29th June

This was the day when we diverged from the official tour. We were supposed to spend the day travelling to and around Lilongwe. However, only Terry actually needed to go back, as he is flying early on to Tanzania on another trip. The rest of us wanted to stay at Senga Bay, so it was arranged that the truck would take Terry and Shanta to Lilongwe, check them into the hotel, then come back to Senga Bay to rejoin us. We may have to fork out for the camping, depending on whether Explore have to pay for the rooms in Lilongwe for us.

Deanne and I walked up to the local craft market: I had to pick up my "ebony" key tags (boot polish supplied the colour), and I watched her buy a little more, at the right price of course.

Some of us went for a mid-morning swim, a short lie in the sun, then I had a shower and retired to the bar. I wasn't tempted to join in with the Exodus group's circle of volleyball (using a football).

We ordered a snack lunch from the beach bar. An hour later, a chef from the hotel down the beach arrived at a nearby hut to start re-heating it. Basically, it took ages to arrive, the chips were cold, but everything else was OK - little comfort for Peter who only wanted chips. Having ordered a group evening meal at the same hotel, we wondered if we'd done the right thing.

Robert, Alan, Dena and I hired canoes for an hour just around the bay. After a while, Alan capsized and couldn't get back on due to the amount of water sloshing around in the hull. He had to take it back to the beach and drain it before remounting. We all noticed that we were taking on water and becoming unstable, so I called it a day after 40 minutes, and handed over a soggy MK200 note.

Both our group and the other Explore group had booked dinner at the restaurant in the adjoining Livingstonia Beach Hotel. There was confusion when we found that both tables had been set up outside, whereas our mosquitophobes insisted that we went inside: we retired to their bar for 20 minutes while the furniture was moved. I enjoyed the meal - service was slow, but the courses were nice. I joined the queue to pay by Visa. At the same time I declined the hotel's offer to change money at 10% commission, but thinking about it I may not have much choice. A swift one in the bar, if only to try and readjust to BST, then to retire to my tent for the last time this holiday.

Day 22 - Saturday 30th June

An unusually cloudy morning greeted us. We traded boiling water for milk with the other Explore group to make breakfast palatable. I went exploring the rocks at the end of the beach, then had a stroll along it. The sun broke through, so I exposed my skin for the last time. I haven't worried too much about sun cream in recent days: there's enough of Peter's factor 35 emulsion impregnated in my skin to protect me for a while.

We had lunch at the LBH, accompanied by a local beat combo. The speed of service was up to its usual African standard: food ordered at 11:45, arrived between 13:00 and 13:30. Serves me right for asking for a burger with egg and bacon but no cheese: those who simply ordered all three toppings got theirs no problem. Still, I enjoyed the music and one of the Spanish women playing beach volleyball nearby. And the burger was very nice when it arrived.

The drive back to Lilongwe included a stop at the alternative craft market, where I bought a couple of carved animals. Carole bought a lamp standard so big that it had to be wrapped in several pieces and loaded onto the truck by porters.

Despite part of the fan being missing, the truck got us safely to Lilongwe. It was late afternoon, so we checked straight into the hotel and stayed there. The room was adequate, but we had a misunderstanding over whether tax should be added to drinks on a bar tab, and whether tax had been added to the restaurant food already: Chris sorted it out. I went for an early night: the others had little option either as the bar closed early.

Going home - Sunday 1st July

It was nice to sleep in a bed again, even for only five hours. We were ready early, but couldn't face the cooked breakfast that was provided.

Both trucks got off more or less promptly at 4am to take us to the airport. The reps' attempts to manage a group check-in seemed to slow things down compared with individuals who overtook us in the queue. This got Alan going on how it should be done, which almost earned him Dena's tripod through his skull.

We felt sorry for Chris, who had hoped to come back with us to the UK to see his girlfriend, but all of our flights were full, so he had to hang around for a few days before flying on to Beirut for his next trip. He had already been denied a conjugal visit when our tour was rearranged to start early, making it impractical for her to come out and visit him before the trip started.

The formalities provided a little more frustration. First there was a $20 departure tax to pay, then one desk checked that I had paid it, the next checked that it was attached to a boarding pass and scrawled on it, and the third checked that I had no Malawi kwacha left. Then came a boarding pass check, then we passed through a row of cupboards: the ladies were searched, which caused a queue just like in a nightclub, but the men simply passed through. We were a little late taking off, and had free seating because the allocation system was not working.

On the ground, the plane got so hot that when the air conditioning was switched on, water vapour condensed in a smoke effect from the ceiling blowers.

On the Addis to Athens leg, I also had a very nice chat on the plane with one of the ladies from the other Explore group who I quite fancied. However, my nerve failed and I didn't ask to exchange addresses.

The anticipation mounted as the carousel at Heathrow started: would my luggage arrive? Ther was a false alarm as my replacement baggage was mistakenly applauded as it arrived safely. But as everyone else's bags turned up and people drifted off, I was the last one left there forlornly. All they could do at the Swissport handling desk was take my details yet again.

That gave me three minutes to exit the airport and find the coach stop. I didn't see a Flightlink coach for Poole, but found others waiting for the 22:30 service. And we waited. And we waited. Then we waited for the 23:59 bus, but that didn't come either. We reckoned that: a) the 22:30 broke down, a private firm was enlisted to do the run, but because of a flaw in the booking system, nobody was down for pick-up at terminal 3 (even thought the other 10 apart from me all had the 22:30 service booked), so it didn't turn up; b) the 23:59 service doesn't call at terminal 3 anyway, only at the central bus station.

It was ironic and fortunate that the night temperature in London was still in the twenties, much warmer than African nights had been! It meant that waiting around outside was not unpleasant.

Anyway, one guy just back from Oslo was on the case. He called the emergency number, and eventually just before 2am a couple of large taxis arrived to take us home. I slept most of the way, but woke up to give directions between Bournemouth and Poole. I got home at 03:45 on Monday 2nd July, just as it was starting to get light: no chance of going to work.