Part Two

From: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
To: Dr. D. Jackson <djlurk@yahoo.com>
Subject: Can we say surprise?

Hey Dr D,

> It's great to hear from you again!

Same! :)

> Don't worry about taking a while to get
> back to me, I know how hectic real life can get.

*phew* Thanks. :)

> > mind me asking, where did you go? I know you're American, and
> > from Colorado... :)
>
> I don't remember telling you that......

I'm psychic. :)

> but I do live in Colorado, fairly near Cheyenne Mountain (where
> NORAD is based - I'm sure you must have heard of them).

Yep, heard of them. And the facility that works beneath them... ;)

> I don't think you actually said, but I hoped you'd put it in. Thank
> you!

Quite alright! :) Have you received much feedback about it?

> > I hope you had a nice Christmas, I know I did. :) How was your
> > new year's?
>
> Quiet, as I spent it with a less than talkative friend of mine. The
> two other friends who we usually socialise with had made their own
> plans.

Yeah, I heard about that. Apparently things didn't go *exactly* to
plan! :) I'm glad you and Teal'c had "fun" though. :)

> > Basically, could you let Sam know that I finished beta'ing
> > "Jacksex.doc" for her
>
> What!!?!
>
> > feeling the well-defined muscles shift under her touch."
>
> Oh my goodness.......

Why do I feel like slapping a big "oops" to my forehead? I take it
you didn't know about this?

> > Oh, and as for a title suggestion, I think her idea of "New
> > Ground" is *perfect*! Apparently there's an episode coming up
> > with that title as well so I'll be interested in seeing if her
> > story reflects any of what you guys will be showing us in a
> > couple of weeks. ;)
>
> I haven't actually read the story. I had a copy in my hand once but
> Sam confiscated it. :-(

Gee, that's too bad--it was a wonderful story. :)

> However, I think I'm safe to say it'll be nothing like
> the mission you're referring to. I have no intention of 'showing'
> anyone anything!

On behalf of shirtless-Daniel-lover's everywhere--*damn*!

> I think I ought to mention that although Sam ended up with the only
> copy of the story, she didn't actually write it.

Yeah, I kinda knew that. The writing style was kind of a give-away,
among other things.

> The real author of the story found your e-mail after going through
> personal stuff on my office desk earlier today. He had absolutely
> no right to do this and I'm very annoyed with him. I think he may
> be going to mail you himself. I get the impression he's unhappy
> about Sam mailing you the story - just before I decided to stop
> speaking to him, he asked me how to spell 'plagiarism'. I think
> you'll find him easy to spot - he always spells 'satisfy' with
> two 't's'.

Well Jack's already emailed me, and yes, I guessed that he'd been
reading your emails (told him as much too!). Also, saying that he's
"unhappy" I think is a slight understatement... if you see Sam, you
might wanna suggest that she goes and hides. I know she has advanced
level three hand-to-hand combat training but still...

> I really don't know - I'll ask her to mail you.

I've hastily replied to her previous email now so hopefully she'll
respond. Please tell her once again that I'm really sorry about all
this.

> > for the moment at least. ;) I hear he got pretty worried about
> > some of the recent discussions. :)
>
> We thought you knew that we knew what you were discussing..... but
> *how*?

Like I said, I'm psychic. :)

> I've passed the message on to Martouf. He said, "Aaarrgghh!!" then
> muttered something about 'a padded cell', 'psychiatry' and 'fluffy
> bunny rabbits'. Personally I think he's lost the plot.

Well, you wouldn't be the first person to think so, but regardless,
the topic of Martouf is basically completely gone right now--ditto
for Narim. Right now we're discussing the finer points of Jack's
latest behaviour on mission.

> > BTW: your secret is safe with me... "Senate Ghostbusting
> > Committee" indeed! LOL!
>
> Oh! Please don't tell anyone, will you?

Of *course* I won't! ;)

Regards, Ness.

From: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
To: Col. J. O'Neill <joneill@sgc.com>
Subject: Your story....

Hey Jack,

> Thank you for your prompt reply.

Well, I've got so many "@sgc.gov"'s in my inbox right now that if I
don't reply to them immediately I'll start thinking that I work for
the government! :)

> > > doesn't belong to her
> >
> > *Really*, I had *no* idea... ;)
>
> I didn't think she would have told you.

Ah, Jack, does the word "sarcasm" mean... hang on--forget that. :)

> > Actually, she never *said* it was hers--rather she just asked
> > if I could beta it for her.
>
> But she didn't say it wasn't, did she?

Well... *no*, but I guessed that it was yours anyway. And if it did
get to the stage of archiving, you would have been sent a "permission
to archive?" email from me straight away.

> > Yeah, that delete key can be nasty sometimes, can't it? :)
>
> Particularly when *someone* tells you 'del' stands for 'deliver'.

Gee, who was that? :)

> > In her email to me, she used the words "tender" and
> > "romantical"--perhaps you heard her wrong?
>
> Considering the volume she said it at, I think that's extremely
> unlikely.

Well, I only have what's in my inbox as "proof" on that matter, so I
think we'll just have to agree to disagree on this one.

> > > and said that one part of it was physically impossible,
> >
> > Actually, it is possible... providing you take the necessary
> > 'precautions' first... ;)
>
> Really? I thought it was..... it's good to get a second opinion!

Always happy to help. :)

> > > I no longer wish it to be sent to the list or archived. It is
> > > obviously unsuitable for public viewing.
> >
> > Now that would be a great shame. And when considering what other
> > people have sent to the list/archive... I don't think you have
> > any worries about your story not 'fitting in'. :)
>
> At the moment, I stand by my decision. I may change my mind at a
> later date.

Well, here's hoping that you will! As I said before: it's a wonderful
story and it'd be a terrible waste for it *not* to be included! :)

> > Now Jack, if she *was* planning revenge (which I doubt) then why
> > would she have sent it to me for beta'ing first? If her plan was
> > revenge, then sending it to the list/archive *without* someone
> > else checking it would have been a better plan...
>
> Why? Was it *that* bad?

*sigh* No, of course not! As I told Sam and Daniel, there was only
one spelling mistake, and one phrase that I thought should be changed
slightly. The rest was fantastic! I wish *I* could have written
something like that!

> > No, no inconvenience, and Jack--go easy on her. :)
>
> I haven't found her yet.....

Well, when you *do* find her, go easy on her. :)

> > Does Daniel know that you've been reading his email? ;)
>
> He does now. But he really shouldn't print his mail out and leave
> it lying around on the desk in his office when I'd arranged to
> meet him there and he was late, should he? I think he may be going
> to mail you soon. I don't think he's very happy, but it's difficult
> to be sure because he won't talk to me.

Well, he *does* have a point Jack--even if it was just "lying
around", that's not really an open invitation, now is it? :)

> BTW, I passed your message onto Martouf. He said, "Aaarrgghh!!!"
> when I mentioned the list, then something about 'rehabilitation',
> 'therapy' and 'fluffy bunny rabbits'. Personally, I think he's
> lost the plot.

Funny, I think I've heard that before... *shakes head* Oh well, tell
him it's completely safe to come back again now. We're destroying
another man's reputation right now... in fact, I think you know
him...

Yours, Ness.

From: Maj. S. Carter <scarter@sgc.gov>
To: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Beta'ing Request

Hi Ness,

Thanks very much for beta-ing the story. It doesn't matter about you telling
Daniel, he's a good friend, unlike someone else I can think of.

> Also, I'm afraid that Jack has now found out that you sent the story
> to me and despite the fact that I assured him that you hadn't
> *claimed* the story as yours, he's now talking about plagiarism and
> positive that you only sent it to me out of revenge. I'm trying to
> calm him down (I figure it's the least I can do), as is Daniel by all
> accounts, but for the record, on sublevel 17 there's a door behind
> the closet in there that leads to an old bombshelter... might I
> suggest hiding?

I've already taken your advice and am currently in the bombshelter, not
because I'm frightened of him but because basically I have nothing to say to
a man that thinks with his %$£&@.

I think after you went to the trouble of beta-ing the story, I owe you an
explanation....

A little over three months ago, the colonel was stranded on an alien planet
called Adora. When it became apparent we weren't going to be able to get him
back easily (or soon) General Hammond posted him MIA. As you can imagine, I
was devastated. Just before the mission we had started to become closer and
I felt all kinds of possibilities were opening up between us.

I worked night and day, often missing meals and sleep, building a device to
help us get him home. On a rare day off, I reread his story (then known only
as Jacksex) and wanted to share this loving, tender, romantic man's thoughts
with others. That was why I sent it to you for beta-ing.

But how wrong I was - when we got to Adora, I was so pleased to see him. I
didn't know what to say first. I did what I always do when I'm a little
nervous, I started on a scientific explanation of how we'd got back to the
planet. I'd only just begun to speak when, without saying a word, he turned
and walked away, straight into Lara's arms. I didn't know what was going on.
Daniel had to spell it out for me. "He didn't think he was coming home."

Then I realised - he'd shacked up with Lara at the drop of a hat and didn't
care about me any more, if he ever had. He's an obnoxious, hard-hearted,
two-timing bastard who deserves to suffer. BTW, could you tell the list that
I think some of their suggested methods of torture were very inventive and
I'd love to try them out, particularly the one with the rusty spoon.

So, as I'm sure you can see, my reasons for wanting to share this story are
no longer valid. I would appreciate it if you would delete it from your
files.

I passed the message onto Martouf - he said "Aarrgghh!!", then something
about 'electric shocks', 'asylums' and 'fluffy bunny rabbits'. Personally, I
think he's lost the plot.

best wishes

Sam

From: Col. J. O'Neill <joneill@sgc.gov>
To: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re:Your story...

Hi Ness,

> > Thank you for your prompt reply.
>
> Well, I've got so many "@sgc.gov"'s in my inbox right now that if I
> don't reply to them immediately I'll start thinking that I work for
> the government! :)

If you don't mind me asking, who else has been writing to you?

> > > Yeah, that delete key can be nasty sometimes, can't it? :)
> >
> > Particularly when *someone* tells you 'del' stands for 'deliver'.
>
> Gee, who was that? :)

Teal'c. Sometimes I worry about him.

> >
> > Why? Was it *that* bad?
>
> *sigh* No, of course not! As I told Sam and Daniel, there was only
> one spelling mistake, and one phrase that I thought should be changed
> slightly. The rest was fantastic! I wish *I* could have written
> something like that!

Wow! Really? I'm very flattered you think so.

>
> > > No, no inconvenience, and Jack--go easy on her. :)
> >
> > I haven't found her yet.....
>
> Well, when you *do* find her, go easy on her. :)

I'm sure she's here somewhere. And I've a feeling Daniel knows where she is
but he's still not speaking to me so I can't ask him.

I don't think he's very happy, but it's difficult
> > to be sure because he won't talk to me.
>
> Well, he *does* have a point Jack--even if it was just "lying
> around", that's not really an open invitation, now is it? :)

Sometimes I just can't help picking things up. It's a bad habit of mine.

> Funny, I think I've heard that before... *shakes head* Oh well, tell
> him it's completely safe to come back again now. We're destroying
> another man's reputation right now... in fact, I think you know
> him...

Please don't talk about Daniel behind his back... he got really upset after
that thing with Kira. He's an extremely sensitive person who cares what
others say about him. And it is the 'Sam' and 'Jack' list!

Yours

Jack

From: Dr.D. Jackson <djlurk@yahoo.com>
To: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Can we say 'surprise'?


Hi Ness,

> > > mind me asking, where did you go? I know you're American, and
> > > from Colorado... :)
> >
> > I don't remember telling you that......
>
> I'm psychic. :)

Really? That's an amazing gift you have there. Does Sam know about this? I'm
sure she'd like to study you.

> > I don't think you actually said, but I hoped you'd put it in. Thank
> > you!
>
> Quite alright! :) Have you received much feedback about it?

I've had a few mails. Everyone has been very nice.


> > > Basically, could you let Sam know that I finished beta'ing
> > > "Jacksex.doc" for her
> >
> > What!!?!
> >
> > > feeling the well-defined muscles shift under her touch."
> >
> > Oh my goodness.......
>
> Why do I feel like slapping a big "oops" to my forehead? I take it
> you didn't know about this?

No, I didn't! Sounds an interesting story though. Did I mention that no-one
has let me read it?

>
> > > Oh, and as for a title suggestion, I think her idea of "New
> > > Ground" is *perfect*! Apparently there's an episode coming up
> > > with that title as well so I'll be interested in seeing if her
> > > story reflects any of what you guys will be showing us in a
> > > couple of weeks. ;)
> >
> > I haven't actually read the story. I had a copy in my hand once but
> > Sam confiscated it. :-(
>
> Gee, that's too bad--it was a wonderful story. :)

Oh, sorry, I *did* mention it! I don't suppose you could send me a copy,
could you? I can't see Sam or Jack ever letting me see it and I'm dying of
curiosity.

>
> > However, I think I'm safe to say it'll be nothing like
> > the mission you're referring to. I have no intention of 'showing'
> > anyone anything!
>
> On behalf of shirtless-Daniel-lover's everywhere--*damn*!

What?... er... what?.... um... I'm very... *very*..... er..... <blush>

> Well Jack's already emailed me, and yes, I guessed that he'd been
> reading your emails (told him as much too!). Also, saying that he's
> "unhappy" I think is a slight understatement... if you see Sam, you
> might wanna suggest that she goes and hides. I know she has advanced
> level three hand-to-hand combat training but still...
>
> > I really don't know - I'll ask her to mail you.

She's currently taking refuge in a bomb shelter on level 17. Since our last
mission she hasn't been happy with Jack and has been avoiding him anyway.
After what she said earlier when I went to see her, I think it's his safety
you should be concerned about.

> > We thought you knew that we knew what you were discussing..... but
> > *how*?
>
> Like I said, I'm psychic. :)

I really must mention that to Sam.....

. Right now we're discussing the finer points of Jack's
> latest behaviour on mission

Yes, I know. It's been *enlightening*. He was kind of reticent about what
happened to him while he was stranded. I know he didn't expect to get back
but he was kind of rude to Sam when we went to fetch him. I'm not surprised
she's mad with him. Of course, I don't think he realises what he's
done...... he can be kind of clueless sometimes.

Regards

Dr. D.

From: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
To: Maj. S. Carter <scarter@sgc.com>
Subject: Ouch!


Hey Sam,

Glad you wrote back, I was starting to worry! :)

> Thanks very much for beta-ing the story.

Very welcome. :)

> It doesn't matter about you telling
> Daniel, he's a good friend, unlike someone else I can think of.

Hmm... now who could that be?

> I've already taken your advice and am currently in the bombshelter,
> not because I'm frightened of him but because basically I have
> nothing to say to a man that thinks with his %$£&@.

Well I'm glad you took your lap-top with you... however, don't *all*
men (at one time or another) think with their %$£&@?

> I think after you went to the trouble of beta-ing the story, I owe
> you an explanation....

Ok...

> General Hammond posted him MIA. As you can imagine, I was
> devastated. Just before the mission we had started to become
> closer and I felt all kinds of possibilities were opening up
> between us.

*sympathetic noise* Of course you were devastated... that's horrible.

> On a rare day off, I reread his story (then known only
> as Jacksex) and wanted to share this loving, tender, romantic
> man's thoughts with others. That was why I sent it to you for
> beta-ing.

Makes sense...

> But how wrong I was - when we got to Adora, I was so pleased to see
> him. I didn't know what to say first. I did what I always do when
> I'm a little nervous, I started on a scientific explanation of how
> we'd got back to the planet.

Happens to all of us Sam, and I'm sure after three months that a
completely understandable reaction.

> I'd only just begun to speak when, without saying a word, he turned
> and walked away, straight into Lara's arms. I didn't know what was
> going on. Daniel had to spell it out for me. "He didn't think he
> was coming home."

I had heard rumours about this...

> Then I realised - he'd shacked up with Lara at the drop of a hat

Three months isn't really a "drop of a hat" Sam...

> and didn't care about me any more, if he ever had.

Now I seriously doubt *that*.

> He's an obnoxious, hard-hearted, two-timing bastard who deserves
> to suffer.

*shudders* Ouch Sam--don't you think you're being a *little* harsh
there?

> BTW, could you tell the list that I think some of their suggested
> methods of torture were very inventive and I'd love to try them
> out, particularly the one with the rusty spoon.

Double-ouch! But I think you should let you know that the listmom's
have put a semi-ban on this kind of talk right now. Not that we don't
necessarily agree with it, but we're trying to keep the list pg. As
for the rusty spoon reference, well, that maybe a little over the
top... have you considered plain ol' fashioned revenge? ;)

> So, as I'm sure you can see, my reasons for wanting to share this
> story are no longer valid.

I suppose so...

> I would appreciate it if you would delete it from your files.

Sure, done, erased from my c: drive.

> I passed the message onto Martouf - he said "Aarrgghh!!", then
> something about 'electric shocks', 'asylums' and 'fluffy bunny
> rabbits'. Personally, I think he's lost the plot.

Deja'vu... oh, sorry. *shrugs* Well, the coast is clear for Martouf.
Jack, on the other hand, well that's a different story...

All the best, Ness.

From: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
To: Col. J. O'Neill <joneill@sgc.com>
Subject: Re: Your story

Hi Jack,

> > Well, I've got so many "@sgc.gov"'s in my inbox right now that if
>
> If you don't mind me asking, who else has been writing to you?

*cringes* Um, well... let's see, ah... Simmons! Yeah, Graham Simmons!
He discovered the list and archive by accident and got kinda upset by
all the "puppy-dog" mentions... he keeps sending me "true stories"
about how dog's are the best thing since sliced bread... especially
when their "owners" are females... well, it doesn't really matter.

> > Gee, who was that? :)
>
> Teal'c. Sometimes I worry about him.

LOL! Tell me, was he drinking coffee again?

> > slightly. The rest was fantastic! I wish *I* could have written
> > something like that!
>
> Wow! Really? I'm very flattered you think so.

Yes, really! :) It was great! :)

> > > I haven't found her yet.....
> >
> > Well, when you *do* find her, go easy on her. :)
>
> I'm sure she's here somewhere. And I've a feeling Daniel knows
> where she is but he's still not speaking to me so I can't ask him.

Have you considered apologising? And not just for the whole "reading
his email" stuff?

> > Well, he *does* have a point Jack--even if it was just "lying
> > around", that's not really an open invitation, now is it? :)
>
> Sometimes I just can't help picking things up. It's a bad habit of
> mine.

Yeah, we've noticed that... ;)

> > him it's completely safe to come back again now. We're destroying
> > another man's reputation right now... in fact, I think you know
> > him...
>
> Please don't talk about Daniel behind his back... he got really
> upset after that thing with Kira. He's an extremely sensitive
> person who cares what others say about him. And it is the 'Sam'
> and 'Jack' list!

Hang on... oh. Yeah, sure--I'll tell the list to "stop talking about
Daniel"... but you know, there *are* other threads going at the
moment...

Yours, Ness.

From: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
To: Dr. D. Jackson <djlurk@sgc.com>
Subject: A sneak peek


Hi Dr D,

Before I go any further--do *not* let anyone else see this email, do
*not* print it off... and *please* delete it as soon as you've read
it...

> > > I don't remember telling you that......
> >
> > I'm psychic. :)
>
> Really? That's an amazing gift you have there. Does Sam know about
> this? I'm sure she'd like to study you.

*cough, cough* Well, the idea of "studying me" doesn't sound too
crash hot I'm afraid, but I am in contact with a doctor who's
"helping" me with it...

> > Quite alright! :) Have you received much feedback about it?
>
> I've had a few mails. Everyone has been very nice.

That's good. :) Have you considered penning another story?

> > Why do I feel like slapping a big "oops" to my forehead? I take
> > it you didn't know about this?
>
> No, I didn't! Sounds an interesting story though. Did I mention
> that no-one has let me read it?

It's very interesting...

> > Gee, that's too bad--it was a wonderful story. :)
>
> Oh, sorry, I *did* mention it! I don't suppose you could send me a
> copy, could you? I can't see Sam or Jack ever letting me see it
> and I'm dying of curiosity.

Well... *glances around nervously* Ok, well after all the trouble
I've caused, I figure this can't get any worse. Here's another
snippet from the story, but as I said before--delete as soon as you
read! Sam asked me to erase my copy of it, and I *did* remove my c:
drive version... *glances around again* but I *kinda* forgot to
remove it from my backup's and sent-box...

"Fleeting thoughts of the Air Force raced through his mind, the words
from various protocol's reminding him that sexual altercation's
between male and female officer's of any rank were officially
prohibited. A fitting warning to his quickly deteriorating thought
processes as his body identified only with the warm, able bodied,
attractive female above him.

She could feel his five o'clock shadow against her lips, the rough
stubble accented by the fading hint of aftershave and soap. Closing
her eyes, she bit at her lip. Not happening, she thought wildly, this
is *not* happening. Opening them again she unwillingly darted her
eyes to meet his, their faces shifting unknowingly with the optical
movement. They both froze, lips resting against each others in an
almost kiss. All of a sudden it was getting harder to breathe, she
thought almost incoherently, her mouth arid. Unthinkingly, she licked
her lips...

He was kissing her. All other thoughts had disappeared, leaving only
the pertinent information of what he was currently doing present in
his mind. He was kissing her... and she was kissing him back. Her
lips were smooth and soft, supple against his. Instinctively his arms
tightened around her waist, his hands moving to splay against her
back, holding her close. At his silent request, her lips parted, her
tongue reaching out to dance with his, their mouths moving against
each others in a primeval caress."

So, how was that? Satisfy your curiosity?

> > > 'showing' anyone anything!
> >
> > On behalf of shirtless-Daniel-lover's everywhere--*damn*!
>
> What?... er... what?.... um... I'm very... *very*..... er.....
> <blush>

LOL! That's so cute! *coughs* Sorry Dr D, couldn't resist. But the
sentiment remains the same... *damn*!

> > might wanna suggest that she goes and hides. I know she has
> > advanced level three hand-to-hand combat training but still...
>
> She's currently taking refuge in a bomb shelter on level 17.

Gee, you have a bomb shelter in an underground base? *innocent look*

> Since our last mission she hasn't been happy with Jack and has been
> avoiding him anyway.

Yeah, I heard about that... not a pretty situation!

> After what she said earlier when I went to see her, I think it's
> his safety you should be concerned about.

Maybe we should warn him?

> > Like I said, I'm psychic. :)
>
> I really must mention that to Sam.....

Well, as I said, I'm already "seeing" a doctor... by the way, do you
know the lyric's to "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"?

> > Right now we're discussing the finer points of Jack's
> > latest behaviour on mission
>
> Yes, I know. It's been *enlightening*. He was kind of reticent
> about what happened to him while he was stranded. I know he didn't
> expect to get back but he was kind of rude to Sam when we went to
> fetch him. I'm not surprised she's mad with him. Of course, I don't
> think he realises what he's done...... he can be kind of clueless
> sometimes.

I think those two need to sit down and *talk*... or apologise...
which ever comes first!

Later, Ness.

From: Maj.S.Carter <scarter@sgc.com>
To:Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Ouch!


> > It doesn't matter about you telling
> > Daniel, he's a good friend, unlike someone else I can think of.
>
> Hmm... now who could that be?

I guess you've probably worked it out by now...

>
> > I've already taken your advice and am currently in the bombshelter,
> > not because I'm frightened of him but because basically I have
> > nothing to say to a man that thinks with his %$£&@.
>
> Well I'm glad you took your lap-top with you... however, don't *all*
> men (at one time or another) think with their %$£&@?

Well, yes.... even Daniel has had his moments.....

. I didn't know what was
> > going on. Daniel had to spell it out for me. "He didn't think he
> > was coming home."
>
> I had heard rumours about this...
>
> > Then I realised - he'd shacked up with Lara at the drop of a hat
>
> Three months isn't really a "drop of a hat" Sam...

It is as far as I'm concerned! He must have known I'd find a way to get him
back. Or send the Tok'ra or Tollans (or perhaps even the Nox) to fetch him.

>
> > and didn't care about me any more, if he ever had.
>
> Now I seriously doubt *that*.
>
> > He's an obnoxious, hard-hearted, two-timing bastard who deserves
> > to suffer.
>
> *shudders* Ouch Sam--don't you think you're being a *little* harsh
> there?

No.

>
> > BTW, could you tell the list that I think some of their suggested
> > methods of torture were very inventive and I'd love to try them
> > out, particularly the one with the rusty spoon.
>
> Double-ouch! But I think you should let you know that the listmom's
> have put a semi-ban on this kind of talk right now. Not that we don't
> necessarily agree with it, but we're trying to keep the list pg. As
> for the rusty spoon reference, well, that maybe a little over the
> top... have you considered plain ol' fashioned revenge? ;)

No, most of my ideas have involved a certain degree of physical violence.
What did you have in mind? I'll consider *any* suggestions so long as he
suffers.

>
> > I would appreciate it if you would delete it from your files.
>
> Sure, done, erased from my c: drive.

Thank you.

>
> Deja'vu... oh, sorry. *shrugs* Well, the coast is clear for Martouf.
> Jack, on the other hand, well that's a different story...
>

Jack probably has no idea what they're saying. It's a shame I'm not talking
to him otherwise I'd tell him about it.

best wishes

Sam

From: Col. J. O'Neill <joneill@sgc.gov>
To: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Your story...


Hi Ness,

> >
> > If you don't mind me asking, who else has been writing to you?
>
> *cringes* Um, well... let's see, ah... Simmons! Yeah, Graham Simmons!
> He discovered the list and archive by accident and got kinda upset by
> all the "puppy-dog" mentions... he keeps sending me "true stories"
> about how dog's are the best thing since sliced bread... especially
> when their "owners" are females... well, it doesn't really matter.

LOL! The list are right! He is just like a puppy-dog the way he moons after
Sam. That guy needs to get a life, she'll never think of him like that.
Though he's right about dogs being cool.

>
> > > Gee, who was that? :)
> >
> > Teal'c. Sometimes I worry about him.
>
> LOL! Tell me, was he drinking coffee again?

Could have been. He's not been the same since Urgo made 'suggestions'. He
keeps bursting into song for no readily explained reason. I'm sick to death
of 'Row, row, row your boat'. And Janet's banned him from the infirmary
after the near miss with the defibrillator.

> > I'm sure she's here somewhere. And I've a feeling Daniel knows
> > where she is but he's still not speaking to me so I can't ask him.
>
> Have you considered apologising? And not just for the whole "reading
> his email" stuff?

I had decided I'd better apologise for the 'reading his e-mail' stuff. On
reflection, I guess that was kind of out of line. Now I've just got to find
him. But I didn't know I'd done anything else wrong. Have I?

> > Please don't talk about Daniel behind his back... he got really
> > upset after that thing with Kira. He's an extremely sensitive
> > person who cares what others say about him. And it is the 'Sam'
> > and 'Jack' list!
>
> Hang on... oh. Yeah, sure--I'll tell the list to "stop talking about
> Daniel"... but you know, there *are* other threads going at the
> moment...

Really, what about? I've been away for a while and have kind of lost touch.

Yours

Jack

From: Dr. D. Jackson <djlurk@yahoo.com>
To: Ness <nessi_anne@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: A sneak peek...

Hi Ness,

> > >
> > > I'm psychic. :)
> >
> > Really? That's an amazing gift you have there. Does Sam know about
> > this? I'm sure she'd like to study you.
>
> *cough, cough* Well, the idea of "studying me" doesn't sound too
> crash hot I'm afraid, but I am in contact with a doctor who's
> "helping" me with it...

Would that be someone like Dr. Mackenzie? You have my sympathy, if it is.

>
> > > Quite alright! :) Have you received much feedback about it?
> >
> > I've had a few mails. Everyone has been very nice.
>
> That's good. :) Have you considered penning another story?

I've considered it, just haven't had any ideas yet!

> >
> > Oh, sorry, I *did* mention it! I don't suppose you could send me a
> > copy, could you? I can't see Sam or Jack ever letting me see it
> > and I'm dying of curiosity.
>
> Well... *glances around nervously* Ok, well after all the trouble
> I've caused, I figure this can't get any worse. Here's another
> snippet from the story, but as I said before--delete as soon as you
> read! Sam asked me to erase my copy of it, and I *did* remove my c:
> drive version... *glances around again* but I *kinda* forgot to
> remove it from my backup's and sent-box...
>
> "Fleeting thoughts of the Air Force raced through his mind,
<snip>
>
> So, how was that? Satisfy your curiosity?

Well, you've left me wanting more! I don't suppose you could send me another
snippet, could you?

> > She's currently taking refuge in a bomb shelter on level 17.
>
> Gee, you have a bomb shelter in an underground base? *innocent look*

Yes, strange isn't it? If a bomb penetrates 17 floors down, I don't think a
shelter is really going to do much good, do you?

>
> > Since our last mission she hasn't been happy with Jack and has been
> > avoiding him anyway.
>
> Yeah, I heard about that... not a pretty situation!
>
> > After what she said earlier when I went to see her, I think it's
> > his safety you should be concerned about.
>
> Maybe we should warn him?

A few minutes ago he found me on level 17, near the bomb shelter.
Fortunately, he was so busy trying to apologise for reading my e-mail that
he didn't ask what I was doing there. As he seemed genuinely sorry, I
accepted his apology. He then asked me where Sam was. When I pointed out
that she really didn't want to talk to him, he asked why. I thought the
easiest way to explain would be to let him read the list mails. I've left
him in the lab doing just that. I'm going home now, before he finishes them.

You can call me a coward if you like. :-)


> > > Like I said, I'm psychic. :)
> >
> > I really must mention that to Sam.....
>
> Well, as I said, I'm already "seeing" a doctor... by the way, do you
> know the lyric's to "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"?

Yes, but I wish I didn't. Teal'c won't stop singing it!

>
> I think those two need to sit down and *talk*... or apologise...
> which ever comes first!

They need to do *something* - the combination of them fighting and Teal'c
singing is driving me mad.....

regards

Dr.D

part 3