ADDICTS’ CORNER

Mike Fox and Richard James make a resolution

Resolution

Our New Millennium Resolution is to stop being nice to everyone. In future this column will not be afraid to name names, and to bestow criticism where it is due. Be warned.

LABORD

A new millennium and a new organisation.
The League Against Boards Of Rong Dimensions, which has an illustrious list of founder members:
CHESS, whose December front cover showed an 8x6 board (but you weren't actually looking at the board, were you?) A very tasteful cover, we thought. Something for everyone, except perhaps Gary Glitter.
The British Chess Magazine: the envelope containing the December issue featured a diagram from the Famous Game Kasparov-Topalov, where Bh3-f1 had just been played. Except that it wasn't Bh3-f1 but Bj3-h1, as a couple of empty files had been added in the middle of the diagram, giving an 8x10 board. This was pointed out by Dr Andy Walker (Nottingham) in a posting to the rec.games.chess.misc news group.
Richmond Junior Chess Club, the front page of whose web site (http://users.globalnet.co.uk/~rjcc in case you'd forgotten), at the time of writing, features a cartoon with a 4x5 board. (The cartoon is part of the clip art collection that comes with Microsoft Office, so you can blame Bill Gates - we've found it's an excellent idea to blame Bill Gates for EVERYTHING. It may well have been replaced by the time you read this. Visit the site to find out.)

LASTBUR 2000

You probably found, as we did, an advert for a Limited Edition Millennium Glass Chess Set endorsed by International Grand Master Julian Hodgson, come tumbling out of your December CHESS. The board, needless to say, is the wrong way round.
In the run-up to Christmas the Daily Telegraph ran a feature - as all papers do - in which journalists ask their brats what they want for Christmas. Alabama Calkin, aged 4, chose a Tournament chess and draughts set, £24.99 from Hamleys. The board in the illustration was the right way round, the kings and queens, predictably, weren't. You'd be much better off anyway, Alabama, going to the Chess & Bridge Centre instead.
DJ Chamberlain Pewsey, Wilts, writes about his holiday in Spain. Visiting a night club he came across a French couple playing chess with the kings and queens the wrong way round. On making enquiries he discovered that they had been playing chess there most nights for the past twenty years.
We've tactfully refrained from commenting on Disney's Chess Guide by Anatoly Karpov in the past. Just for starters, the illustration on the title page shows the board the wrong way round.
A boy at one of our schools brought in a chess book we hadn't seen before. We don't recall the title but it was written by one Nic Brett and was, we think, a Funfax book published by Henderson. The diagrams are indeed the right way round, and the co-ordinates are helpfully shown on each one. Unfortunately, throughout most of the book, the white pieces are set up on ranks 7 and 8, and the black pieces on ranks 1 and 2.
Tim Krabbé proposed a reason for chess sets being set up with White on the left in the Open Chess Diary on his wondrous web site (www.xs4all.nl/~timkr/chess/chess.html). While staying in New Zealand he came across a chess set with a dark square in the right hand corner. He set it up the right way round and went for a walk on the beach. On his return he found he had been corrected. "People think it's more beautiful that way", he concluded.

IAGOCOT 2000

We were writing this column while listening to the second test between South Africa and England. "It's almost a game of cat and mouse chess" said the commentator.

From the Other Side

In last autumn's Variant Chess, a fascinating report by John Beasley of a wild weekend in Geneva playing some of the wackier variants. Here are a couple that you may find diverting:

Three Check Chess

A game that gives the underdog a chance by rewarding sharp attacking play. You win by giving mate or by giving three checks (not necessarily consecutive). The odds apparently favour White, so Black should get a clock start. (John remarks en passant that One Check chess would be a forced White win)

Chessgi

Sometimes called Crazyhouse Chess. A sort of Western shogi - like Three Check Chess, it also rewards attacking play. A player who captures a man adds another man of the same kind to his own force. He can subsequently drop it on any vacant square instead of playing an ordinary move. (RJ adds: this is very popular on ICC - it's in effect two player exchange chess - which is known as Bughouse in the US.)

Pearly Gates

From a recent newspaper profile of Paul Allen, co-founder of Microsoft with the aforementioned Bill G:
"When they played chess, Gates would often make aggressive opening moves but end up losing to Allen, who had spent more time studying the game."

Black Humour

Again from Tim Krabbé's Open Chess Diary, a joke:
A chess master died—after a few days, a friend of his heard a voice; it was him!
'What's it like, where you are now,' he asked.
'What do you want to hear first, the good news or the bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first.'
'Well, it's really heaven here. There are tournaments and blitz sessions going on all the time and Morphy, Alekhine, Lasker, Tal, Capablanca, Botvinnik, they're all here, and you can play them.'
'Fantastic!' the friend said, 'and what is the bad news?'
'You have Black against Capablanca on Saturday.'

Short & Sweet

Yes, it's back. Another thousand years of short & sweet games. But first some of the best of the last millennium, or, if you're as pedantic as our first contributor, the current millennium.
John Saunders Kingston, believed to be the editor of some other magazine which thinks chess boards have 80 squares, e-mailed us these gems:

John Saunders - M Broers
British U18 Championship Blackpool 1971
Philidor Defence
1.e4 e5 2.Nf3 d6 3.Bc4 g6 4.d4 Nc6 5.dxe5 Nxe5 6.Nxe5 dxe5 7.Bxf7+ Kxf7 8.Qxd8 Be7 9.Qd5+ Kf8 10.0–0 Nf6 11.Qxe5 Rg8 12.Bg5 Ng4 13.Qxe7#

From the first round of the tournament, John's opponent telling him before the game he was out for a quick win. At the end of the tournament, Broers was on 0/11 (marred slightly by a last round default), the winner, Jonathan Mestel, finished 10½ points ahead, possibly a record gap for a BCF Congress 11 round event. (John charitably didn't give the loser's name. The Column That's Not Afraid To Name Names looked it up.)

David Stevenson - NN
Junior County Match Bedford 1968
Highly Irregular Defence
1.e4 Nh6 2.d4 f6 3.Bxh6 gxh6 4.Qh5#

Played by John's schoolfriend, now living in Hudson, Ohio. The organisers were still putting out the clocks when play started. When they reached David's board, after about 30 seconds, "Do you want a clock?" "No thanks, we've already finished."

Neil Saunders - John Saunders
High Wycombe 1966
Centre Game
1.e4 e5 2.d4 d5 3.c3 dxe4 4.dxe5 Bg4?? 5.Qa4+?? Nc6 6.Qxe4?? Qd1#

John's first win against big brother Neil, who taught him the moves, after five years of trying. "If 5. Qxg4 had been played, it is highly probable that I would have given up chess for ever and someone else would now be editing BCM."

John Hendry - Tom Bradford
High Wycombe 1968
Larsen Opening
1.b3 g6 2.Bb2 Nf6 3.Nf3 Bg7 4.e4 d6 5.e5 dxe5 6.Nxe5 Ng4 7.Nd3 Bxb2 8.Nxb2 Qd4 9.Qc1 Qxf2+ 10.Kd1 Ne3+ 1–0

Still in Kingston, thanks to Nick Grey for a copy of their chess club newsletter. We were delighted to come across a Short & Sweet game by an old friend of both columnists:

Derek Coope - Hugh Wylie
Surrey League 1999
Modern Defence
1.c4 g6 2.d4 Bg7 3.e4 c6 4.Nc3 e5 5.dxe5 Bxe5 6.Bd2 Nf6 7.Nf3 Bc7 8.Bg5 0–0 9.Qd4 Kg7 10.e5 Qe8 11.Bxf6+ Kg8 12.Qh4 h5 13.Qg5 Kh7 14.Bd3 1–0

From Michael Burniston County Cork, a game from the Major Section of the Monarch Assurance Isle of Man Tournament, which bears a distinct similarity to a win by Geraint Edwards we published a few years ago (we don't recall the name of the loser).
Michael Burniston - Glenn Cross
Isle of Man Major, 1999
Queen's Gambit Declined
1.d4 e6 2.c4 d5 3.Nc3 Nf6 4.Nf3 Bb4 5.Bg5 Nbd7 6.e3 c6 7.Be2 Qa5 8.0–0 Ne4 9.Nxe4 dxe4 10.Ne5 Nxe5 11.dxe5 Qxe5 12.Qd8# 1–0

Finally, one of our shortest and sweetest contributions, sent in by Ron Pearce Wroughton, Wilts

K Vygodchikov - Mikhail Yudovich
Handicap Tournament 1935
King's Pawn Game
1.e4 e5 1-0

The explanation: Black, a master, was giving odds of pawn and move to the other competitors in the tournament. Starting without his f-pawn he resigned without waiting for 2. Qh5+.

Book News

We bought a copy of Chessdon, by US chess organiser Don Schultz on the strength of the encomiums on the back cover, but were, frankly, disappointed. It might be excusable for someone not familiar with British politics to think the Chancellor of the Exchequer lives at 9 Downing Street. Perhaps a slip of memory might explain his reminiscences of his Belgiam GM friend Albert O'Kelly. But what should we make of someone who has been involved with almost every major chess event of the past 30 years, but who believes that the second Fischer-Spassky match took place 25 years after the first? Schultz is a worthy organiser who has done much for the game over the years, but in this book he comes across as the Forrest Gump of chess.

Much more enjoyable was A Gnat May Drink, a self-published book by Jonathan Hinton. This is a lovingly compiled collection of 100 games, one for each year of the century, with detailed annotations. The selection reflects the author's predilection for tactical slugfests, and is none the worse for that. An added bonus is the number of unfamiliar games: clearly much painstaking research has gone into both the choice of games and their analysis. We'd have liked a little bit more in the way of historical perspective, but no doubt space was at a premium.

The game from 1984 features a weird opening.

Gabor Kadas - Sergey Arkhipov
Kecskemet 1984
Kadas Opening
1.h4 e5 2.d4 exd4 3.Nf3 c5 4.c4 d5 5.e3 dxe3 6.cxd5 exf2+ 7.Kxf2 Nf6 8.Bb5+ Bd7 9.Re1+ Be7 10.d6 Bxb5 11.Rxe7+ Kf8 12.Ng5 Be8 13.Qb3 Ng4+ 14.Ke1 c4 15.Qf3 Nf6 16.Qxf6 gxf6 17.Ne6+ fxe6 18.Bh6+ Kg8 19.Rg7+ Kf8 20.Rxb7+ Kg8 21.Rg7+ Kf8 22.Rd7+ Kg8 23.Rxd8 Kf7 24.d7 1–0

Millionaire

You probably saw GM Jim Plaskett's abortive appearance on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. For those of you who missed it, we can report that he failed to answer three absurdly simple starter questions correctly. You'd have thought a self-styled expert on Darwin's theory of evolution would have been able to name parts of the body in the right order. Jim's excuse: one of the buttons on his console wasn't working. A likely story. We reckon marriage to the lovely Fiona has fuddled his brain.

Barrymore

Meanwhile, RJ received an e-mail from Michael Barrymore, or, more accurately from one of his researchers, asking for children to audition to appear on Kids Say The Funniest Things playing chess against MB on a 'human chess board'. (They didn't ask for anyone to audition for the part of the human chess board. Any suggestions?)

This brought back memories of a programme we were involved in about 15 years ago, the story of which has, until now, not been told. We accepted an invitation to take a party of kids up to the Barbican to film a programme, one of a series hotsed by a couple of 'alternative comedians' featuring a different sport or hobby each week. We were asked to set up a chess event the following day: a hotline was set up so that anyone who wanted to take part could phone for details.

The programme consisted of a sketch in which a game of chess was interrupted by one of the presenters in a wheelchair (he had a broken leg) knocking down all the pieces, followed by interviews with some of our kids. The children were asked questions like "How do you distract your opponent?" and fed answers such as "Kick him under the table" and "Spill my coffee over him". It was all horribly demeaning, both to the participants and to the game of chess.

We booked a venue for a chess event the following day and invited Mike Basman along to provide coaching. Nobody turned up.

From what we'd seen of Kids Say The Funniest Things (admittedly only half an episode) and other programmes presented by Barrymore, we had no reason to suspect that the questioning would not take a similar course. So, 'Thanks, but no thanks' was our reply.

V for Victory

A phone call from the bard, drawing our attention to the second match game between Bacrot and Judit Polgar. After Bacrot's 50th move he had a pawn wedge stretching right across the board. Two moves later, the wedge had been converted to a pawn chain from the second to seventh ranks. Here's the game, described by Nigel Short in the Sunday Telegraph as the Immortal Pawn Wedge Game.

Judit Polgar (2671) - Etienne Bacrot (2592)
Rapidplay Match Bastia (2) 04.11.1999
Ruy Lopez

1.e4 e5 2.Nf3 Nc6 3.Bb5 a6 4.Ba4 Nf6 5.0–0 b5 6.Bb3 Bc5 7.c3 d6 8.d4 Bb6 9.Be3 0–0 10.Nbd2 Bb7 11.Re1 Re8 12.d5 Ne7 13.Bxb6 cxb6 14.Bc2 Qd7 15.Bd3 Rec8 16.Rc1 Rc7 17.b4 g6 18.Qe2 Rac8 19.c4 Nexd5 20.exd5 Nxd5 21.Be4 f5 22.Bxd5+ Bxd5 23.Qd3 Be6 24.Ng5 bxc4 25.Qh3 Qe7 26.Nxe6 Qxe6 27.Qc3 b5 28.f4 e4 29.Nf3 Qf7 30.Nd4 d5 31.Rcd1 Re8 32.Kf2 Qg7 33.h4 Rce7 34.Re3 Rd7 35.h5 Qh6 36.Ne2 Qxh5 37.Qf6 Qh6 38.Qc6 Red8 39.Qe6+ Kh8 40.Rh3 Qg7 41.Nd4 Rd6 42.Qe5 Qxe5 43.fxe5 Rb6 44.Ke3 Kg7 45.Ne2 Re6 46.Nd4 Rxe5 47.Nc6 d4+ 48.Kf4 Red5 49.Nxd8 Rxd8 50.Ra3 d3
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51.Rxa6 c3 52.Rc6 c2
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53.Rc7+ Kf6 54.Rc6+ Kf7 55.Rc7+ Kf6 56.Rc6+ Kf7 57.Rc7+ Ke6 58.Rh1 d2 59.Rxc2 d1Q 60.Rxd1 Rxd1 61.Rc6+ Rd6 62.Rc5 Rd2 63.Rxb5 Rxg2 64.a4 g5+ 65.Ke3 Rg3+ 66.Kd4 Rd3+ 67.Kc4 Ra3 68.a5 g4 69.Rb8 g3 70.Rg8 Ke5 71.Kb5 f4 72.a6 e3 73.Kb6 Ke4 74.a7 e2 75.b5 0–1

Of course we needed no further prompting to search our database for games featuring pawn wedges and chains. We were surprised to find only five other games with pawn wedges. In each case White possessed the wedge and went on to win the game. We found no other games featuring both a complete wedge and a complete chain, so until someone claims otherwise, Bacrot has scored two firsts.

In the first pawn chain game, White sacrifices an exchange followed by a rook to force mate:

Amos Pokorny - Karl Berndtsson-Kullberg
Hamburg Olympiad 1930
King's Indian Defence

1.d4 Nf6 2.c4 g6 3.Nc3 Bg7 4.e4 d6 5.f4 0–0 6.Nf3 Nc6 7.Be2 Re8 8.0–0 Bg4 9.d5 Nb8 10.h3 Bxf3 11.Bxf3 Nbd7 12.g4 h6 13.Be3 a5 14.Kg2 Nh7 15.Qd2 Nc5 16.Bxc5 dxc5 17.e5 Ra6 18.Qe3 b6 19.Rad1 Qc8 20.Be4 Nf8 21.Rd3 a4 22.Qg3 Rd8 23.f5 g5 24.Re3 Nd7 25.Bc2 a3 26.b3 f6 27.e6
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27...Ne5 28.h4 gxh4 29.Qxh4 Kh8 30.Rxe5 fxe5 31.f6 exf6 32.Rxf6 Kg8 33.Rxh6 Ra8 34.Rh8+ 1–0

In our next specimen, a teenage future world champion sacrifices to set up the chain.
Tigran Petrosian - Petrovsky
Leningrad 1946
Bogo-Indian Defence
1.d4 Nf6 2.c4 e6 3.Nf3 Bb4+ 4.Bd2 Qe7 5.g3 Nc6 6.Bg2 Bxd2+ 7.Nbxd2 d5 8.0–0 0–0 9.Re1 Rd8 10.e3 Bd7 11.Rc1 Rac8 12.a3 Na5 13.Ne5 c6 14.c5 b5 15.f4 Be8 16.Qc2 Nd7 17.e4 f6 18.exd5 fxe5 19.d6 Qf8 20.dxe5 g6 21.b4
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21...Nb7 22.Nb3 Qf7 23.Nd4 Nf8 24.a4 a6 25.Ra1 Qg7 26.Qe4 Ra8 27.axb5 cxb5 28.Qxb7 1–0

In our next game, White's space advantage enables him to sacrifice the exchange:

Alexander Chernin (2600) - Eric Prie (2435)
Marseille Marseille (4), 1990
1.c4 c5 2.g3 e6 3.Bg2 Nf6 4.Nf3 a6 5.Nc3 Qc7 6.e4 d6 7.0–0 Be7 8.Qe2 Nc6 9.d3 0–0 10.h3 Rb8 11.Be3 b5 12.b3 b4 13.Na4 Nd7 14.d4 e5 15.d5 Nd4 16.Nxd4 exd4 17.Bd2 Re8 18.Rae1 Bf8 19.g4 g6 20.Qd1 Bg7 21.Nb2 a5 22.f4 Nb6 23.Nd3 Ba6 24.Qc2 a4 25.e5 f6 26.e6 Nc8 27.f5
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27...Ne7 28.Nf4 gxf5 29.Nh5 Kh8 30.Rxf5 Nxf5 31.Qxf5 Qe7 32.Be4 1–0
For the record, the other games we found were Stefan Proniuk - Dirk Legahn RLNS 1981 and Ernie Scott - Jerry Coley Correspondence 1995.
We'll look at pawn chains in a future article.