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From March 2000...

Friday 3rd March...This week I have mostly been eating you, your momma too, and yer da. Wow, I actually updated on the right day, what a guy! We didn't actually do much this week, so this installment will not really be an installment, but just an install, or an ins, maybe even an in. Anyway, I went to see "American Beauty"...you can read my opinion on the films page. But, apart from that, nothing much else happened. I recorded my film on Wednesday, and according to Jeff, it was "cuhrap", but he's bald. We did photography today, so me, Fletch and Matthew found a graveyard and posed all over the stones. I was about to take a photo of some shit lying on the ground when my camera stopped working...god, it could've been a masterpiece. So, apart from that, nothing much else happened...sorry to have disappointed you, but fear not...tomorrow I will see my buddies (as we didn't see much of each other this week), and we shall go : Waaah!! Mon did unpaid menial work in MZTD this week...ooh, stick him...SEE YEE!

Friday 10th March...This week I have mostly been eating doggies. Ho! Updated on time again...this is becoming a nasty habit. So, what happened this week? We went to see Douglas Coupland, and he was shite. Boring boring boring. We didn't even stick around to get his autograph. I think it was just the age gap...I didn't agree with anything he said, and his monotone voice was getting on my titties. Sorry, Dougie, but you're old. We filmed Kill 4...lovely. What else? Yeah, coming soon is a Kill website, woohoo! Aren't you excited? Fitzy went to see Blink 182, and we laughed at him for liking them. None of my photographs from last week turned out...what a pisser. I edited my film this week, and I think it's fantastic. I only have to put titles and music onto it, and it'll be a masterblaster. We're going to the Cathouse tonight for something to do, and then probably to Fitzy's on Saturday to stay because his maw and da are gawn away. We may even film Kill 5, or 6, because 5 may require my hoose...but, you never know. We're in the studio on Monday...yeaaah. I think we're doing Kill The Past. Who knows?...SEE YEE!

Friday 17th March...This week I have mostly been eating strawberries and berries with straw. What the fuck do you think you're playing at? Baseball? Hello, chaps, welcome to another edition of me spouting pish. We went to the Cathouse on Friday and we're going again tonight...blah...although, one of the main reasons we're going again is due to Fitzy getting the Back To The Future soundtrack and we want to persuade the DJ to put on "Power Of Love". Did you know it's a curious thing? It makes one man weep, and another man sing. We went into the studio on Monday and recorded "Job Slowly Killing", and it was crapola. God, I'm sorry, Bill. So, what else happened? Not much. I went to a talent show last night in my old school, and, once again, it has been proven that there is, in fact, no talent in that school. There were a couple of bands, and by god...there are no words to describe them. But it was interesting to see Juan's da play the drums badly...ha, Juan's da, yer a bumbelerie. Call me, call me by my name-o. We did Kill 5 at Fitzy's hoose, and it was good. We also made a leg hang from his loft, and covered the bathroom with shoe polish! Yes! Then Fitzy felt guilty, the fag. We also watched "Masters Of The Universe" and "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"...yaaas! Ye wahnt a fight, wee man?...SEE YEE!

Sunday 26th March...This week I have mostly been eating the sun. It might just change your li-i-fe. That's right, they played "Power Of Love" at the Cathouse on Friday. And, yes, I realise this is Sunday and not Friday, but fuck yeez. Haw, man...what happened this week? Well, not much really. Last Saturday, we went to a really pishposh party where, once again, we were alienated and completely condescended. Hey, when plastic wrestling toys are more entertaining than the other guests, you know there's something wrong. The week after this was pretty bodgers. We recorded "We Intend To Destroy..." in the studio on Monday, and it was pretty good. On Friday we ate custard creams while being shouted at by the manager of Safeway. And last night we stayed up to watch many films - "Green Ice", "Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas", "The Frighteners", "Teen Wolf", "National Lampoon's Vacation", "Fletch Lives" and "The Return Of The Living Dead". Fantastic...not to mention Fitzy was a bastard, for various reasons, none of which I can actually remember, but he was a pure bastard at that. So, sorry this is so short, but my eyes are fawn oot ma heed...SEE YEE!

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