She's All That
As reviewed by Miguel Cardiacarrest Kesey
I went to see "She's All That" starring some people whom I don't know...it had that bitch from The Faculty in it, you know, the one that was a goth and then wasn't because the film completely discriminates against different social types...and no way would that wee bastard EVER get the popular bitch...Anyway, that's the Faculty...I'm here to talk about She's All Dat.
Anyway, I can't actually remember much about it, but it seemed like a rip-off of the 80s smash-hit movie "Dance Til Dawn"...although, no-one's ever seen it. Now THAT was a good film. It had Matthew Perry very young and Christina Applegate and Kelsey Grammar, strangely enough who plays a hypocritical chemist. Anyway, that's Dance Til Dawn. I'm here to talk about She's ALL DAT MUTHAFUCKA!
It was a typical shite movie, there's a strong, popular jock dude (who, uncharacteristically was intelligent...yeah, right!) who bets that he can make any girl prom queen, so he asks out the school sadass, who's Macaulay Culkin's wee brother's big sister.....errr....you know what I mean? Ok, Mon doesn't get that, so I'll explain it. The girl he asks out's little brother is played by Macaulay Culkin's real life brother. Anyway, it turns out that he actually wants the stupid bitch when she gets made-over...typical, another American attempt to make everybody the same...much like the subconscious plot of The Faculty. That film was good, but there's definitely something disgustingly fascist about it...Anyway, that's the Faculty...I'm here to talk about She All Dat And More.
The only really cool bit about She's All That was the "The Real World" parody parts starring Matthew Lillard who sadly died in Scream...It's quite funky junky...there's enough 80s comedy there to make all of you 80s teen-movie fans go : "Haw haw!" like me...but there's not enough. There seemed to be lots of bits in the movie where the actors would wait, as if the director told them to, expecting the audience to be in hysterics...I mean, it doesn't have the raw sarcasm that a real 80s teen movie has, like Heathers...that was really cool...But that's Heathers....I'm here to talk about She's All That.
Aww, man... The crap soundtrack is annoying...it has that really fucking shite song by Sixpence None The Richer in it, and it really makes you want to vomit. There are scenes of total romanticism that should NOT be there...annoying!!! Beth dies in Little Women by the way...
The end.