The Years have been hard

My name is Bernard Philip Rawston, I am 22 years old. I was brought up with 7 brothers and 2 sisters; I have only got one proper brother, the rest of them are all step. When I was about 5 years old my mum split up from my dad, I didn't know the reason why but she took me with her. When I found out the reasons why, when I was getting older, I didn't like my mum for doing that, so I left home just before I was 16, I was on the run for a year and when I was 17 I moved to Darwen and stayed at the Stonham hostel.

I got myself sorted out with a job and all that, so I moved to Blackburn, got my own house and lived there with my mates. I really found out what my mates were like and that, but before I found out they used to treat me alright, but when I got older and started realising the situation that I was in, I'd take no notice of them. So I left that house, moved somewhere else, I just kept moving and moving and moving because you can't settle down, in my situation, with the people I knew, it got worse and worse and kept me going into crime.

I started crime with my brother when I was young. I'd put my hand through a letterbox and pulled people's keys out of the door box . I'd give the keys to my brother and he would go in the house at night and take whatever he wanted. As I got older I realised there was no point to it because I wasn't getting my life sorted out. I just made it worse and worse. I couldn't get a job because of my criminal record and if I carried on with it I'd just end up in a prison. It would keep me there for years, and when I came out I would have to try and get a job but I don't think any boss would have taken me on, so I decided to try and keep out of trouble. I think the best thing for the people on the streets now would be for the Government to give them Council work; the towns would get cleaned up, tidy, all sorted out; the crime situation would go down because they're all working, and if they left that job they couldn't go back on the dole and if they left that job they must have another job to go to. That's the only way you can sort the problem out, just put people onto town work, clearing the towns up, whatever interests them.

When I was homeless, I had no food, I had nothing so that's what started me into crime just to keep myself fed, alive and clothes on my back. That's all you can do, just go around thieving from people, taking stuff that isn't rightfully yours - someone elses. I became homeless due to a frustration that had built up inside myself, it made me explore inside myself and that's the only way I could deal with it by leaving home to sort my head out; go out on the streets and I felt that was the only way I could do it. It just comes to a point when you find out the situation you are in, you have to leave home and just live on the streets, thieve whatever you can get, sell it on and make your money that way. I was lucky, when I was 16 I got a job, but things never really worked out because my mates led me into drugs, well I got myself into them, because they were smoking them, then it went on to heavier drugs; I started not going into work so I ruined that chance for myself, but if I'd realised at the time instead of later on in life, I would have sorted my life out, but you don't realise it until you've done it. That was one of the worst things I ever did.

The future for me now is to keep off the crime wave and just try and manage what I have got now, and realise that I need to sort the rest of my life out before I get older, it is better to do it when you are younger then when you get older because you get more chances of sorting it out when you are still young.

REST IN PEACE Mark tragically died this year. He had been captivated by a lifestyle of drugs. Our prayers and thoughts are with his family