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EDGES MAGAZINE Issue |
October 1998 |
DARRYL'S SEARCH
Life
at the moment is not a bed of roses for me. There are lot of things
going on with moving to a new town and everything, getting to know new
people, I'm just finding it a bit hard at the moment, I'm finding it
hard to make ends meet. I've been a bar manager in the past; I've been
a head barman at a couple of public houses. Since I've been up here
I've had one job, I've only been up here 3 months, and I actually got
a job in the Adelphi. Depression - well it's hard to
explain really, I just feel deeply enthralled in myself, I feel I can
touch my inner self more, but it's hard to explain. I have been
feeling quite depressed today. I've been snapping at a few people when
I shouldn't really have done, and I've apologised since and
everything, but as I say it just makes me not want to socialise
really, because it just puts me to the edge. Life ... I've
not really got any big views on it even though I'm part of it, as
they'd say. It can be cruel to some people, it can be kind to some
people, but everybody gets a bit of both in life don't they? Life's
been kind to me over the years - well, when I was living with my fiance,
even when I was living at home with my parents, but the happiest I've
been in life was actually when I was living with Emma, my ex-fiance.
We only split up a few months ago, that's why I'm up here now, trying
to build up my life again. I do feel as though I am going
round in circles, and you can be caught up in a vicious circle, at the
moment I feel its on the worst side really, its just what's been going
on really. Over the last few weeks there has been a lot of things
building up, there has been a death in the family and I took that
really badly because the girl who actually died was like a sister to
me. At the moment Darryl is homeless
but he continues to search for more permanent accommodation.
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