Edges Issue 17: I left home when I was 16

EDGES MAGAZINE Issue 17

April/May 1999

I Left Home When I was 16

Terry speaks to Edges

I first left home when I was 16. I didn't get on with my step-mum, so I moved out and I went to live with my aunt. But that didn't work out so I had to move into a hostel. I liked moving into the hostel because it was an opportunity to have my own space and freedom. It also taught me to become more independent.

When I lived with my aunt I did get on with her, she was okay at first, she just changed; I can't really describe how, but I wasn't going to let it be like it was living at home, so I decided to move out. I lived in a very small town and the fact that I came to live in a bigger town scared me. I didn't know what Cannabis was until I was sixteen. When I came to Blackburn I was surrounded by many drugs. I have experimented with Cannabis but that's it, I've managed to stay off everything else.

I have suffered from epilepsy from an early age; I often have seizures, it is quite weird to explain how it feels because I don't really know how to describe it. It's a very very strange feeling. I remember once I was out with my friend Andrea. We went ice-skating and when it was time for us to go home we went our separate ways and I had a seizure; and whatever happened it resulted in me staying under a bridge all night. I woke up the following morning feeling very hot and confused. When you have a fit you usually sleep for a long time afterwards, you'd be tired and drowsy. I can't really keep a job down because of my illness, people don't understand, the people hear I have epilepsy, they say keep him away. Last July I went for an interview for CSV volunteer. I am still waiting for a reply, I keep ringing them up. Because of my illness there seems to be nothing at all and other CSV's wait a maximum of 3 months. It's now 9 months for me and I haven't heard anything. It just makes me feel inferior. In the past I have had a job. I started work in a shop. They knew I had epilepsy but they still employed me, but the day after the manager came in and he literally fired me on the spot. This was because of my illness, but it was in front of all the customers and it made me feel sick.

I am a member of the British Epileptic Association, every month we meet up in different places and do social activities. The last one was in Silverdale, we went for a walk. I do have some close friends who are understanding about it. At least I know if I have a fit in their presence I am safe. I don't like being on income support, I certainly don't like being on it for the rest of my life. I hope these seizures could just disappear and I could live a normal life. I wish companies and employers would accept people like me.