LEARNING TO COPE WITHOUT DRUGS

I’ve been with the T.H.O.M.A.S. Organisation for the last ten weeks.

I’ve learnt how to cope with life without drugs. My way of thinking has changed – the things that I do; the things that I say; I have changed so much. My attitude towards people has changed.

I’ve discovered a different person in me. I’m a kind and caring person. I’m not the same as I was when I was using drugs.

I started using drugs when I was fourteen years old. It began with cannabis. I had a problem with alcohol, not with drinking it all the time, more that I couldn’t handle myself when I was on it. I was violent with drink.

When I was sixteen years old I met my girlfriend through some friends. After a year of being together we split up. Two years down the line we ended up back together. It was good and I loved her. I know now that it was not the relationship for me. When we split up at the beginning of last year is when I started touching heroin. I felt lonely and I turned to the drug. I was so much against it as well.

I’m glad that I’ve only been on it a year and I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t need it.

I’ve been in prison five times for violence. I’ve been in Lancaster Farms four times, two on remand and two convicted. It was through drink as well. I didn’t know how to cope with my anger. Recently, I have learnt how to cope with anger and walk away from situations. I can even go out and have a social drink without it leading to getting drunk. I don’t go out to get drunk anymore.

Heroin is a totally different story. When I started using it I knew what it was going to do to me. At the time I didn’t care.

I am the most important thing in my life at this time. I now care what happens to me. I don’t want the life that some of my family have had. I want to be different to what I’ve grown up around. My dad’s name Haggan has got a bad reputation but I don’t want to be part of that. I want to be part of my dad but not the reputation. I don’t need it. Being here with T.H.O.M.A.S. has equipped me with ways to deal with that.

I want a better way of life now. I want kids and I want a decent job. I want to be normal. It has shown me here how to deal with my emotions and everything that has happened to me.

As I look ahead to the future I want to get my own place. I would also like to go to college, do some voluntary work and set myself up for a brighter future.

What I think is special about this project is the people who run it. The one thing I’m not used to is people caring. There is a lot of love in this place. People come down here to help and they don’t have to, a lot of it is voluntary. I have had a good upbringing until I was sixteen but I’ve never had people care for me since then, until now.