Sept 2002

John shares his thoughts.

Why did we not spot it? Because you were very good at hiding it from us.

When we confronted you what did you do? You lied, because all users are expert at lying.

How did we find out? Because the tell tale signs began to appear, such as, never having any money although you were working full time, making excuses to borrow money, losing respect for your appearance, not eating properly, losing weight, staying in your room more than is normal.

What happened when the problem became public? You took this as the opportunity to do whatever was necessary to feed your habit, such as, stealing from your family and friends, selling your possessions, starting to use in the family home.

What did we do to try to help you? We made appointments at the doctor's, community drug unit, tried to solve your debt problems. But this is where the conning started, because you were not ready to give up on drugs at this time, so you played along.

This was the time that you really started to hurt your parents and family. We believed that you were seeking help, but things never seemed to get any better, the lies were still there, the methadone never seemed to be decreasing, the needles started appearing, the tinfoil, the candles, the sleeping tablets. You even gave us hope by going into rehab, but two weeks after finishing you were using again, so giving us more pain.

So what do you think was happening to us whilst all this was going on? Well let me tell you. We were worried that you may end up dead, or you could end up being in trouble with the Police, you would lose your job. The tension in the home was unbearable, the whole family was stressed all the time, it affected our home, work and social lives. We had to live with the disgust of our friends and neighbours. We had to change the locks on the doors to stop you coming in the house and stealing, we took the lock off the bathroom to stop you using in there, we had to hide away anything of value to stop you stealing it. Eventually the strain became so bad that we had to seek medical help, as our health began to deteriorate. Then, as if you had not done enough already to hurt us, you left home without any warning and disappeared, not telling us where you were. You would not answer your phone, although you knew it was us ringing you, we were expecting a call from the police or hospital at any time to tell us you had overdosed and were dead.

This made the tension as bad as it could be, so bad that we became virtual zombies, not eating, not sleeping, snapping at each other, arguing all the time.

Until you become a parent yourself, you will never experience the love and pain that a child can inflict on its parents and family.

You are clean now our child, but please do not put us through it again, because it will destroy your family forever.

left arrowback button right arrow

This Document maintained courtesy of BS Web Services
Material Copyright © 1997-2002 THOMAS (Those on the Margins of a Society)
Registered Charity Number 1089078