hypa RELEASE
hypa has recently adopted a policy of honesty and openness, which is why we now make available much of the important information in our possession. The information below has been released by hypa to media outlets, so it may already have been reported in your local media.
hypa Press Release: 16 January 1998 at 0900 EST
Following the allegations that have been made against us in the last week, hypa can now offer total proof that none of our staff use humour enhancing drugs to artificially enhance their comments. All of our staff have been tested at a private Swiss clinic for the chemicals used in humour enhancing drugs - and all have tested negative.
The large amount of money that hypa paid to the private clinic should be taken as an indication of the quality of their work, and it in no way represents a 'cosy relationship' as some cynics have suggested.
hypa Press Release: 14 January 1998 at 0930 EST
hypa strongly deny the rumours that our staff use humour enhancing drugs. All of the pages on our internet site, for example, are written by naturally talented people. We reserve the right to consider legal action against anyone making these unfounded allegations.