My Faith in God

Paul - THOMAS Community Blackburn

I was born in Bootle in 1967 into a Catholic family. Most of the people in Liverpool were Catholic and believed in God. I was brought up in a household that was not a holy family but we all believed in God. As it was the way we were brought up, we went to Catholic schools. My first school was ‘The Holy Ghost School’ where church was part and parcel of going to school. I had a good upbringing and went to church every Sunday right through junior school. I suppose when I went up to High School my church life went out of the window. I started to behave badly in school, eventually being expelled. I never went back to school and so started my life of crime and drugs.

After years of a bad life, prison and the deaths of people I loved, a brother and friends, I lost faith in God. In fact I just didn’t believe anymore. Now I’m trying to better my life by staying clean from drugs and bettering my life, to become a productive member of society. I am in a 12 Step rehab. Now I’m clean and serene. I have come to a void in my life where I began to think something was missing; I just wasn’t happy within myself; I just couldn’t get my head round it. I’d wanted to be this way for so long but I wasn’t happy; I wasn’t sleeping. I listened to suggestions and although it’s not a holy programme God is mentioned. My Higher Power was my dead brother; I wasn’t praying to him or anybody when I shared this with my peers but I was advised to start praying to whom, I did not know. So reluctantly I started to pray lying in my bed at night.

I had no intentions of getting down on my knees but all of a sudden things started happening for me. I started sleeping better; I was more content within myself. I shared this with our David who is also in recovery from drugs and drink. He has been clean for nearly two years and he advised me to get on my knees as there is a God. Now I get down on my knees every night and I feel better for it. I now pray to God to give me guidance and have a good day, for anyone who is in my thoughts. All of a sudden I have back my faith in God. He hasn’t left me; I had left him. God is restoring me back to sanity.

 


 

In Prison At 17

Aaron - THOMAS Community Salford

I was in the Turning Point Project just across the way in Lower Broughton Road from here. I had stayed clean for a couple of months and doing NA meetings when someone moved in and introduced me to heroin. I thought I was doing well in recovery but I hadn’t been faced with any challenges. I obviously wasn’t doing as well as I thought I was. It spiralled from there. I had been going to ASPIRE and I knew the lads from THOMAS. They could see me going down quite a lot and at this point they advised me to move in. I took up the offer quite happily.

Since coming into THOMAS I have discovered a high level of self-respect, more than I had anyway. It’s like having a family again. I am trying to meet everyone’s expectations which I have never had before. It feels good to hit those targets and to know that someone is proud of what you have done. You shouldn’t need a pat on the back but I do, to keep me going and that is what I have found at THOMAS. I am now twenty-two years old and I first went to prison when I was seventeen for wounding with intent - a stabbing offence. I was under the influence of drugs at the time.

I have been in gang orientated situations where death has been threatened, firearms, things like that I have done. The bad experiences have been when I have done robberies whilst under the influences. But I was young and I didn’t let it get to the point where I was doing this often just occasionally. Then I dragged myself into recovery with the help of THOMAS.

I am actually hoping to do A Levels and do a degree in Criminology. I know that I can do it. I am quite bright actually despite the past, I just took the wrong road which looked a more attractive route towards a lot of money. It turned out – well I am here so it wasn’t too good. In the future I know that the main aim is to get an education. I have had jobs in the past which I just jumped into and they had no prospects or the money didn’t increase and I got sick of it.  I am quite materialistic and like nice things and once I get bored of the not-so-good money I end up in the same situation.

 

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