hypa PROBLEMS
Problems, problems, problems. Everyone has them - even YOU. If you think you haven't got any then you are only repressing them. That will eventually lead to you committing messy suicide unless you take action now. We suggest that you look for help in the items below or send your problem to us using the form at the bottom of the page. We guarantee a prompt and tender reply.
Mongolian Man Mystery
Dear hypa, I am finding it impossible to meet the man of my dreams here in Outer Mongolia. Just when I think I've found the right person they turn out to be Ghengis Khan. What do you think I should do?
Considering the number of offspring that Ghengis Khan is known to have had, it is quite likely that whoever you date will turn out to be a little bit Ghengis Khan. hypa advises you to date the person with the largest number of yaks in your village. If you don't like him, try the second biggest owner of yaks, etc. . . .
Recovering Capitalist
Dear hypa, I used to be a capitalist but now I am cured. However, sometimes I am tempted to stray back into those mistaken ways. How should I stop myself from doing this?
We suggest that you keep a copy of Das Kapital with you at all times (handy pocket-sized editions are available) and when these terrible temptations start to grip you, take it out of your pocket and hit yourself over the head with it. This kind of do-it-yourself aversion therapy will help you stay on the right track.
If you have a problem, we can solve it
As a caring organisation, we'd like to help you with the problems in your life. Remember, a burden is always lighter if you get somebody else to carry it for you. Type your problem in the box below and click 'Send Form'.